[WantingtoHeal]

I know most people tend to get depressed in the winter time, but it's just the opposite for me. I live in the south and get severely depressed in the summer time when it's so hot. It's already in the 80s right now and the lawn mowers are out this weekend. I can't quite identify why, but I have always hated summers and weekends. I get very depressed during them. In the winter, I can wear big sweaters to cover my body so I feel better. In the summers, I feel hot and gross. Summers and weekends were always so empty and lonely and just awfully hot. I am always thinner in the winters than in the summers.

I've been depressed for as long as I can remember. Been on meds for almost 30 years. Some years better, some not. Starting to seem a bit futile.

[dailyhealing]

Sorry you feel so down.

[night owl]

Originally Posted by WantingtoHeal

I know most people tend to get depressed in the winter time, but it's just the opposite for me. I live in the south and get severely depressed in the summer time when it's so hot. It's already in the 80s right now and the lawn mowers are out this weekend. I can't quite identify why, but I have always hated summers and weekends. I get very depressed during them. In the winter, I can wear big sweaters to cover my body so I feel better. In the summers, I feel hot and gross. Summers and weekends were always so empty and lonely and just awfully hot. I am always thinner in the winters than in the summers.

I've been depressed for as long as I can remember. Been on meds for almost 30 years. Some years better, some not. Starting to seem a bit futile.

I live in Finland where we have almost 5 months of "total" darkness, not actually here in southern part but anyway the the days are short. Here are many who suffer of SAD because of the lack of sunshine. For me it is just the opposite: I call March the depression month
(in Finnish Maaliskuu = masennuskuu; Maaliskuu= March(month) & masennus (depression) and April is the month of going crazy... (April = Huhtikuu & crazy= hullu)).

The more beautiful and sunny the days are, and longer (lighter) the more depressed I get. One reason seems to be that everyone, specially media (but definetly not only!), think that you can NOT be depressed as sun is shining and the grass starts to grow (- not yet: now we have still snow and here in countryside mud, mud, mud..) and later in April/ early May the first flowers will bloom.
And I hate this all! I feel (& hear & read) that I can't be depressed when the soil and whole world is rebirthing after long, dark and cold winter. So that means I'm a loser because I don't enjoy this spring time?? If I could I'd hide under all blankets and get my nose out some time in September... I don't like summer either: either it's too hot or too rainy. My migraine "loves" bright sunlight and heat...

Right now is the worst time: I feel all of my energy goes into acting that 'everything's okay' and inside I am only tired and bitter ('cause I can't enjoy all the things others do) and plain exhausted!

I wrote this only because I understand what it means to hate summer (& spring), all the people in their summer clothes and so-ooo happy. Are they really happy or do they just 'play along', I dont know. But for me this has been a lifelong problem (I'll be 50 this year, in September - my favourite month )
And how to get other people understand? No way.... so far.

[ariesmars]

winter=happiness

spring/summer=angry, hatred, depressed, locked up, trapped, tortured.....