International Depression

Basically I have no home. I have lived abroad all my life moving from city to city and country to country atleast every 3 years untill i graduated last summer after which i moved back to my home country since my parents' job would no longer pay for my living abroad with my family. I hated it in my home country, Finland, I had not been living there since I was little and I did not feel at home at all. I guess that's what I'm struggling with, that I have no real home. I am currently studying Sweden as I thought a change of scenery and a whole new start could make me feel better. It did not though, I just feel like there is no place that I belong and no place that I can call home apart from where ever my family is. We've also just decided to move in together with my boyfriend, but even that seems to be an issue for me since he is from norway and has his whole family and all of his friends living close by he doesn't want to leave and as I have nothing to leave behind anymore I can't think of a reason not to, allthought I cannot help but be a little scared since I have never lived there and do not speak the language- he would be my lifeline. I guess I'm just wondering if maybe you've had some experience with third culture kids before and had any advice on how to handle this because I am really running out of ideas. I just don't seem to belong anywhere. Thank you for taking your time and if you can help out.

Hello & Welcome, Thirdculturekid!

I have had first- and second-hand experience with culture/transition shock and reverse culture shock (or reentry shock). These are phenomena you can easily research, but, as you are experiencing, they may involve severe disorientation, depression and anxiety.

Through many dislocations in my own life, I've found a tiny number of friends. interests and involvements have provided much-needed continuity. Even today, I have no emotional investment in the community where I reside. "Home" is people and interests.

Your situation is similar to that of the children of highly-mobile military families ("military brats", etc.). In addition to the obvious disadvantages to being a TCK - third culture kid, you may have as yet unseen strengths as well.

Significant depression and anxiety may need the attention of professionals. Do you feel you would benefit from seeing a doctor or counsellor?