[jbaker30]

I have lied and hurt a lot of people partially based on my depression, but mostly due to my own mistakes. I am learning to forgive myself and try to find happiness in myself. Yet, whenever I feel happy, I feel guilty because I feel like I don't deserve to be happy after all that I did. Is this normal?

[sweathers81]

Im sure we've all hurt people sometime in our lives. I know i have. Its good that your trying to find happiness. We all deserve happiness, we need to be able to function in society, and if your unhappy you won't be able to be a positive role model for people around you.
How you tried to make amends to the people you've Hurt? Maybe you should start there if the guilt about it is making you feel like that. Or if you have you just need to forgive and learn from your mistakes and try to move on.
Best of luck to you just:-)

[AngelWolf3]

I have been there, my friend. I totally understand where you are coming from. Swethers81 had the right idea. Try to make amends if you can. I know it is really really hard to do that, believe me, it took me almost 5 years to finally work the nerve up to make amends with the people I betrayed. and it still hurts to write this even now, even though no one knows who I am! But I will tell you, it felt SO good when 2 out of the 3 people forgave me. It was like a huge weight was lifted and the burden of that was gone. I still don't feel like I deserve to be happy about things, though sometimes, and I get reminded of what I did, but if you can forgive yourself even for a moment, it is a step in the right direction. The main thing is, (at least from what I am gathering from your post) is that you have changed and are sorry. That is a HUGE accomplishment right there. hugs to you (if that is ok) and good luck