[punkinpie7812]

I have a son with behavioral problems.He also has ADHD, learning delays, Anxiety, and Autistic tendencies. He steals, lies, has exposed himself((showed his penis to other students)), grabbed a teacher's breast, said and done violent things that have gotten him thrown out of school. What has bothered me the most is his aggressive behavior toward his 3 year old brother. I have punished and talked to him until i am blue in the face. He doesn't change his behavior and often denies he has done anything wrong. I just don't know what to say or do to help him. He has been in therapy since he was 8 years old ((He is currently 16)). I recently tried to get him additional help through a program called Familys1st. However upon arrival the counselor informed me that her expertise is with kids with normal IQ and recommended a program he was in for years but that program did nothing to help him so i feel it is another lost avenue to turn for help. However the problem is currently not my son. It is me. The last few months i have not been handling things very well. I find my self just going off on him when he does or says things that are wrong...saying and doing things i thought i'd never find myself doing..just being down right mean. I feel extremely guilty for my behavior, but don't know how to resolve my problem with anger. Can anyone help with some advice???????

[CastlesInTheAir]

yikes, magic wand? hugs, kisses, and all that stuff...

there is an add/adhd forum you might want to check out on here.....

keep moving and keep tweaking his treatment and finding other treatments and programs there has to be a light somewhere....

[TerryL]

Oh there's no need to feel guilty at all. You are under so much stress. as triciadrich mentioned, forums/support groups would be a good outlet.

also, did something happen in the last few months that made you feel worse? btw, not saying your son has the disease but because you mentioned he was violent sometimes it brought to mind the question of might he be schizophrenic? I have been watching these shows on children with schizophrenia and they all had violent ideations. (there is a schizophrenia forum on PC too)

[Leed]

Dearheart have you had ANY respite at ALL? Are you with him 24/7? Is there any way for you to get away for awhile? You need some REST!

It's perfectly NORMAL for someone to lose their temper when they're subjected to this kind of behavior 24 hours a day, day in and day out! Who WOULDN'T blow their top?? How can you be expected to be a calm, understanding, patient mother when you're around a very disturbed young man?

My friend, you MUST get some time away from him regularly. There MUST be some program that gives you some respite care. SOMETHING must be available, perhaps thru social services, or perhaps thru your insurance program, but PLEASE check it out. You've got to have some time off, away from him at LEAST one day a week if not more!!! You're burning out, and driving yourself insane.

See what you can arrange. God bless you and believe me, you'll be in my prayers! PLEASE keep us informed, will you?? WE CARE!!! (((BIG HUGS))) Lee

[punkinpie7812]

Thanks everyone for your support. Leed i am around him a lot more this summer than during the school year...maybe that is the problem. Also, he is around his younger brother a lot more this summer so they get into it and argue and fight a lot more. Terry a few things happened last few months to stress me out. In the beginning of May a large amount of money was stolen from my purse. I was sick with my stomach condition for the month of May.i also suffer from depression and anxiety. Also my dad has been sick(throwing up daily) and my dad received news that the walls of his heart are thickening. My dad is pretty much the only person i can really count on to be there in times of need. As far as the idea of schizophrenia it has not been mentioned by any of the professionals that have seen him, but who knows...sometimes it takes a long time to recognize certain illnesses. Thank so much everyone for the support. It means a lot to me.

[TerryL]

Originally Posted by punkinpie7812

Terry a few things happened last few months to stress me out. In the beginning of May a large amount of money was stolen from my purse. I was sick with my stomach condition for the month of May.i also suffer from depression and anxiety. Also my dad has been sick(throwing up daily) and my dad received news that the walls of his heart are thickening. My dad is pretty much the only person i can really count on to be there in times of need.

Oh no wonder you are getting frazzled. You are only human. especially with your dad getting sick and him being the only person you can count on..on top of the depression and anxiety...I would be so stressed too if I were you. I hope posting has helped a little.

[punkinpie7812]

I went to see my therapist yesterday. She pointed out all the positive things i have been doing , but it is really hard. I feel so depressed and worthless. If it wasn't for my kids I'd be in bed all day. I am trying to keep things going for their sakes. I try to keep my head up and smile around my kids,but its hard when you are so down inside.