[mamamaggie89]

Has anyone else had this issue?
I see these threads about tips on overcoming depression, on focusing on the things that bring you happiness..
and I kind of just gloss over them. I will purposely avoid reading some of them even though I am pretty sure there are helpful hints to be had there.
Why am I avoiding the advice? Is it some kind of denial? Or maybe I want to be miserable. I feel weird

[Jordang]

Originally Posted by mamamaggie89

Has anyone else had this issue?
I see these threads about tips on overcoming depression, on focusing on the things that bring you happiness..
and I kind of just gloss over them. I will purposely avoid reading some of them even though I am pretty sure there are helpful hints to be had there.
Why am I avoiding the advice? Is it some kind of denial? Or maybe I want to be miserable. I feel weird

Are you afraid of change?

[layla11]

Hi, I dont know. But maybe your not there yet. You are thinking about it though. You dont have to know why you do it. Maybe be easy on yoursel and say I might do it.

Originally Posted by mamamaggie89

Has anyone else had this issue?
I see these threads about tips on overcoming depression, on focusing on the things that bring you happiness..
and I kind of just gloss over them. I will purposely avoid reading some of them even though I am pretty sure there are helpful hints to be had there.
Why am I avoiding the advice? Is it some kind of denial? Or maybe I want to be miserable. I feel weird

i don't really read them either, but then i've come to the conclusion that no matter what i read and try, it's not going to get better.... i've been hearing the same thing for years and now it's all just empty words to me.

[mamamaggie89]

Originally Posted by Jordang

Are you afraid of change?

I'm not sure. To be honest, my life has done nothing but constantly change in the last 6 years. Literally, non-stop. Like being stuck in a dang revolving door.

[mamamaggie89]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

i don't really read them either, but then i've come to the conclusion that no matter what i read and try, it's not going to get better.... i've been hearing the same thing for years and now it's all just empty words to me.

The thing is, I haven't been diagnosed, but I have been struggling for years. Trying to understand what's going on with me, why I keep feelin this way. I've never been told these things, really. Probably because I have never told anyone in my family or most of my close friends how I am feeling. It's like I don't want to get better. I don't even talk to most of my friends anymore. I don't really talk to my family. I just kind of isolate myself.

[regretful]

Depression is an illness filled with conundrums, the most prevalent of which is that even though our body is telling us to get up and feel better, our minds "trick" us into believing that we'll feel depressed for a long time. Depression logic is strong; I often think that I should isolate when I'm depressed because nobody would want to be around me; but the opposite is true and necessary to help break out of the depression. Recently, I've forced myself to tell the people that care what is going on with me; that socialization is one of the keys to overcoming depression.

If you have not been diagnosed yet, then visit a therapist or a psychiatrist. See if talk therapy will help; or check into medications that might be useful. Just don't give up. It took me four years to figure out what was going on in my head. I'm just starting to turn the corner now. Not sure what's around it, but I do know that it's not more depression.

Best wishes.

Originally Posted by mamamaggie89

The thing is, I haven't been diagnosed, but I have been struggling for years. Trying to understand what's going on with me, why I keep feelin this way. I've never been told these things, really. Probably because I have never told anyone in my family or most of my close friends how I am feeling. It's like I don't want to get better. I don't even talk to most of my friends anymore. I don't really talk to my family. I just kind of isolate myself.

[mamamaggie89]

I wish I could afford to see a therapist or psychiatrist. I have medical debt already, debt from culinary school, and also trying to pay rent and figure out a divorce and trying to get custody of my son. I feel spread far too thin, and don't know what to do. My family has been helping me with as much as they can, bill-wise.

I just don't know if I can handle all of this

[mamamaggie89]

I wish I could afford to see a therapist or psychiatrist. I have medical debt already, debt from culinary school, and also trying to pay rent and figure out a divorce and trying to get custody of my son. I feel spread far too thin, and don't know what to do. My family has been helping me with as much as they can, bill-wise.

I just don't know if I can handle all of this

[plumapplepear]

Is there a county department health that might have a counselor?

[mamamaggie89]

I don't think there is one that I qualify for. First of all, I've had trouble getting a texas state ID because I am not listed on the lease or utilities where I live, and thus do not recieve mail that they accept at the dmv. I have my change of address form but them want more than that and none of the mail I recieve here counts. So I have a colorado ID and the county won't help me..

[mamamaggie89]

also I think I make too much each month, but I haven't gotten far enough to check that yet

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

i don't really read them either, but then i've come to the conclusion that no matter what i read and try, it's not going to get better.... i've been hearing the same thing for years and now it's all just empty words to me.

I agree, as SS has put it.

I have gotten a liitle better, but I just call it "maintaining".
Haven't tried any suicide attempts, since a year ago.
My meds are doin a little something...
I like talking w/ my therapist, as she's my only listener.
No help there though..
I thought I was weird for a long time and the only one who has all my symptoms, till I found this website.
i'm overwhelmed by all the people who need help.

at least I'm trying to change and get better.
at least i'm makin the effort
to me thats all that's important.

Good luck in all you do.

[regretful]

You can also see if the University in town has a free clinic.

Originally Posted by mamamaggie89

I wish I could afford to see a therapist or psychiatrist. I have medical debt already, debt from culinary school, and also trying to pay rent and figure out a divorce and trying to get custody of my son. I feel spread far too thin, and don't know what to do. My family has been helping me with as much as they can, bill-wise.

I just don't know if I can handle all of this