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  #1  
Old Dec 13, 2012, 12:28 PM
Anonymous32451
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i'm wondering if their's anyone else on here who has this feeling.

1 of the reasons you decide not to kill yourself, has something to do with the fact that our worse off people out their?

i mean... their are people out their suffering from cancer and other terminal illness who may not get a chance at life- they will die early, however... we have just mental illness, and want to take our lives?

does anyone else feel that guilt... that we've been given that gift, and we just choose to waste it- even though we know some people may never get the chance?
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  #2  
Old Dec 13, 2012, 02:12 PM
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Originally Posted by shattered sanity View Post
i'm wondering if their's anyone else on here who has this feeling.

1 of the reasons you decide not to kill yourself, has something to do with the fact that our worse off people out their?

i mean... their are people out their suffering from cancer and other terminal illness who may not get a chance at life- they will die early, however... we have just mental illness, and want to take our lives?

does anyone else feel that guilt... that we've been given that gift, and we just choose to waste it- even though we know some people may never get the chance?
Emotional pain can be as bad or worse than physical pain. Deep depression is devestating because it is still not completely understood, and society views suicide as a selfish act. Depending on your religon, a sin as well.

I use the 'other people are suffering worse" when I have problems dealing with my chronic migraines, but the way I have come to cope with suicidal feelings is by realizing that it causes more pain than it cures. Those left behind will always feel guilty that they didn't notice, or if they did, they never tried to step in and stop it. Others will feel angry at the person who has commited suicide because they gave up. Only someone who has been in the position of seriously thinking of taking their own life can truly understand.

There will always be people who would like a second chance but will die early. That is going to happen whether someone commits suicide or not. Maybe one day people will finally accept that emotional pain is as real as physical pain. When that happens, people will be less afraid to ask for help without worrying about what friends and family will think.

There are always other choices besides taking your own life. That doesn''t make people who have cowards or bad people. Everyone has their breaking point, and its different for each victim. Off hand though, I'd say that any arguement you can come up with to talk yourself out of suicide is valid. Every life is precious, and as long as you are able to contribut anything to society, (helping those on this forum counts), there is a reason to stay on this earth.

Sam2
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  #3  
Old Dec 13, 2012, 02:33 PM
Ladyzero Ladyzero is offline
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As a widow to suicide, I've seen what it does to people left behind. Total devastation, sadness, grief, anger, regret, guilt, are some of the emotions felt.

Suicide is never the answer, it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

Yes, life is a gift, don't waste it, or throw it away.

There is always another way, we must not ever lose hope, however low we feel.
  #4  
Old Dec 13, 2012, 04:10 PM
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I often find myself jealous of those with terminal illness and wish I could trade places with them.
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  #5  
Old Dec 13, 2012, 07:54 PM
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I tend to think that depression and mental illness can claim lives the same way "physical" illnesses can. Maybe some suicides are the same as the body dying in terminal illness.
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  #6  
Old Dec 13, 2012, 08:41 PM
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I can completely understand the guilt,
But mental illness is just as life threatening as physical illness in a sense.

We can't control our suicidal tendencies, not without therapy and medication, that is. And if our symptoms flare up it could be catastrophic!

And just because there are worse off people out there doesn't mean that your problems are not important.
Thanks for this!
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  #7  
Old Dec 13, 2012, 09:04 PM
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i have felt guilty about it too; but i agree with what everyone says; in group therapy today we were talking about mental illness being just as devastating as anything physical.
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  #8  
Old Dec 14, 2012, 05:35 AM
Anonymous32451
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I often find myself jealous of those with terminal illness and wish I could trade places with them.
you're not the only one!

i used to know someone who always told me she wished she had cancer... just to finally be noticed.

can kind of see where she's coming from though... and it's really not a stupid thought that you have
  #9  
Old Dec 14, 2012, 12:32 PM
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I struggle with feeling guilty because my aunt is fighting very serious cancer.
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  #10  
Old Dec 14, 2012, 02:34 PM
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hanni hanni is offline
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the bible actually mentions us i find comfort in psalms 34:18
It says; "God is near to those that are broken at heart, and those crushed in spirit he saves."
i think thats us
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  #11  
Old Dec 15, 2012, 01:41 PM
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Originally Posted by shattered sanity View Post
you're not the only one!

i used to know someone who always told me she wished she had cancer... just to finally be noticed.

can kind of see where she's coming from though... and it's really not a stupid thought that you have
I have often felt that way myself. In fact, the other day I had to get a pelvic ultra sound because there appeared to be something wrong when I had my female check-up--and I will have to get a biopsy in a couple of weeks. A part of me hopes that something IS wrong just for that same reason.
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  #12  
Old Dec 15, 2012, 03:33 PM
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I have often felt that way myself. In fact, the other day I had to get a pelvic ultra sound because there appeared to be something wrong when I had my female check-up--and I will have to get a biopsy in a couple of weeks. A part of me hopes that something IS wrong just for that same reason.


let me know how the biopsy goes

praying for you
  #13  
Old Dec 15, 2012, 07:01 PM
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I prefer having a bad mood to not existing... I'll fight to the end.
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  #14  
Old Dec 15, 2012, 07:17 PM
fading99 fading99 is offline
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I often find myself jealous of those with terminal illness and wish I could trade places with them.
Wow, I feel that way a lot, but didn't realize that others did. When my sister-in-law passed away earlier this year, I remember thinking how lucky she was because she didn't have to try to figure out life anymore. I was definitely jealous, but pangs of guilt for feeling that way surfaced later on. Almost every day I spend large sections of time thinking about not being here anymore, just falling asleep, and not waking up, you know?
  #15  
Old Dec 15, 2012, 07:26 PM
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I prefer having a bad mood to not existing... I'll fight to the end.
I know this is a serious topic and all, but I just wanted to say your avatar is hysterical!! I was feeling a little sad before and I honestly laughed when I saw it
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  #16  
Old Dec 15, 2012, 10:47 PM
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I am not sure how having to live with the unpleasant symptoms of mental disorders is a gift exactly. Not only is the psychological pain bad...but the physical aspects can be pretty terrible as well. For instance I have constant digestive discomfort from my mental issues especially the PTSD since when your brain tells your body to stay on guard and not waste energy on digestion or other not immediately vital functions it makes things difficult. Sometimes I cannot even eat because I am so on edge it makes me too nauseous.

So I guess I cannot say that is a reason I hold back...whether people with cancer or people with mental illness are worse off is rather subjective to me...and even than thinking of people who are worse off in ways does not really do anything to reduce the unbearable pain I deal with. Its a different sort of pain than cancer causes I am sure but just as real.

Also I might add something about the phrase, 'its a permanant solution to a temporary problem.' well mental problems are not always 'temporary.' there are some symptoms I have that I will have to live with for the rest of my life. Sure I am not suggesting suicide is the answer but yeah it is hard not to consider it when specific things bring me down further or when I am frustrated because I cannot figure out any solutions, especially with the knowledge that I will not be free from all the unpleasantness in my head in my lifetime. I don't know whether its ever intended or not that phrase to me seems to sort of downplay the issues one may be experiencing that drive them to feeling suicidal. I mean how can the observer know if the particlular problem was temporary for that individual...but perhaps I read into things too literally.
  #17  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 08:29 AM
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I have often felt that sense of jealousy and the accompanying guilt. It's one of the more troubling thoughts that come to me. But I'm not having those thoughts and feelings right now.

RJ
  #18  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 08:55 AM
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Sometimes I think about how worse off others are. Most of my suicide related guilt comes from wondering what the reaction of my family would be. Every time I feel suicidal, I just think of how my father would react if I went through with it. The guilt is enough to keep me away from suicidal thoughts for a while.
  #19  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 11:27 AM
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Suicide Guilt? ... No.

Survivor's Guilt? ... Yes.

There are so many people out there with so much more to lose than I ... I would gladly fork over my life to save a parent the heartache and grief of losing a child, or to save a child the sorrow of losing a parent, etc. ... But life doesn't afford us that option and I find it rather sad that it does not.

I do not feel guilty that I have mental health issues. I do not feel guilty that suicide remains an option for me. I hope it never comes to that, but if it does, then that's my business and nobody else's.

Furthermore, I will never sit in judgement or condemnation of people who've already chosen that option. I simply find it sad that any of us can get to the point of such hopelessness in our lives that we feel it's the only remaining option to end the pain.
  #20  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 11:28 AM
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Perhaps you would find it easier to help others then. Get into some sort of charity work or something. I don't know why you guys think you can help people while you're dead when you can save lives while you're alive - as in more than one.

I know you guys are feeling really bad but the only way to get over bad feelings is to force yourself to do something about it. When you're depressed your body malfunctions in so many ways that it's barely reliable enough to do anything. You can't really trust it anymore... You have to find natural ways to kick it back into working for you. Your body will tell you to lie down because it just wants to feel good. The body's only functions are survival and feeling good and since depression sends signals to the brain that you can't do anything it will take action to start to undo some of those effects.

Right now you're probably in that "giant hole of nothingness" situation and you don't feel like doing anything ever but that is something you have to work against. This is not going to go away on it's own. Your body has been trained to react to stimuli differently than normally and you have to train it back into some kind of shape.
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  #21  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 11:33 AM
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If only it were that easy ...

Workin' on it, though.

  #22  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 12:18 PM
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Yeah I know it's hard. I was lucky enough to get pulled out of the worst of my depression. But most of the progress came from being more active. There are plenty of other things to work on...
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  #23  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 01:00 PM
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Originally Posted by NoCake View Post
I know you guys are feeling really bad but the only way to get over bad feelings is to force yourself to do something about it.
Unfortunately, sometimes even the best efforts to do something about it don't get people very far. It's more than just feeling bad, not always something one can get over even if they do try.
  #24  
Old Dec 16, 2012, 01:17 PM
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Unfortunately, sometimes even the best efforts to do something about it don't get people very far. It's more than just feeling bad, not always something one can get over even if they do try.
Yes but it's farther than you were before. Maybe it's nieve but it's something. I hate feeling this way and not being able to be completely happy with anything I do. So I really don't care how much pain I have to go through to get over it. It hurts either way so I may as well do something while I'm hurting.
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