[jean17]

How do we live like this? How do we accept that this is as good as I'm going to get? Depression is weighing heavily on me. I'm doing everything that I can: meds, psychotherapy, workbooks, but I just can't get rid of it. How can I learn to live like this for the rest of my life? I feel like there is a wound so deep inside me that it will never heal. I am so sad.

[gayleggg]

One day at a time. I, too, suffer from depression. I'm bipolar and keep waiting for an upswing but I can't even get that. I feel like I will never get out of this hole. The sadness weighs heavy in my chest and I feel it will never lift. I just keep making it from one day to the next and have hope things will get better. Hang in there. Keep working with your doctor.

[allimsaying]

(((jean17)))) I know how you feel. It may not encourage you to say Ive lived with depression 30 + years but I need to tell you that so you can understand my answer.

You're fortunate these days. 30 years ago depression was never spoken of. I hope you find writing your feelings out helpful. I know that would have helped me a lot back then. Having others to share with is a special blessing. Thank you Doc John

You may not be visual so Im not certain I can explain this in a way you'll understand but I'll try.

Image all your thoughts like a plate. All of your thoughts are that dish and if you can imagine a dish, imagine it laying face down. All your thoughts are in that plate.

Right now, all your thoughts are about the depression, what its doing to your life and how badly it feels. I know those feelings are real and be overwhelming.

All your thoughts right now are telling you that this is bad, will never be good, hurts and sucks all around. Remember, the plate is holding your thoughts and its upside down.

You see the future as more meds, more darkness, less joy, a waste. I know how that feels.

> How do we accept that this is as good as I'm going to get?

Maybe you can change the word accept into adjust. Im not asking you to enjoy, be happy, or love what you have. Im asking you to not give up, to give yourself time, to work with some of the process, to agree with letting go of the idea that the future will always be bleak, and to look for, and find, just one tiny ray of sunshine , somehow, everyday.

I know its hard and this may not help at all.

Getting back to the plate. If you took the plate and turned it over, all your feeling could still stay attached, they dont have to change overnight, they couldnt, but, visually, tip the plate over, sunny side up, with the thoughts and feelings facing the light, where they could all stay intact just as you feel right now, only, instead of turned upside down and buried in the darkness, they can now feel the sun, where the daylight is, where seeds can grow and blossoms can bloom.

I know it hurts.

[jean17]

Originally Posted by allimsaying

(((jean17)))) I know how you feel. It may not encourage you to say Ive lived with depression 30 + years but I need to tell you that so you can understand my answer.

You're fortunate these days. 30 years ago depression was never spoken of. I hope you find writing your feelings out helpful. I know that would have helped me a lot back then. Having others to share with is a special blessing. Thank you Doc John

You may not be visual so Im not certain I can explain this in a way you'll understand but I'll try.

Image all your thoughts like a plate. All of your thoughts are that dish and if you can imagine a dish, imagine it laying face down. All your thoughts are in that plate.

Right now, all your thoughts are about the depression, what its doing to your life and how badly it feels. I know those feelings are real and be overwhelming.

All your thoughts right now are telling you that this is bad, will never be good, hurts and sucks all around. Remember, the plate is holding your thoughts and its upside down.

You see the future as more meds, more darkness, less joy, a waste. I know how that feels.

> How do we accept that this is as good as I'm going to get?

Maybe you can change the word accept into adjust. Im not asking you to enjoy, be happy, or love what you have. Im asking you to not give up, to give yourself time, to work with some of the process, to agree with letting go of the idea that the future will always be bleak, and to look for, and find, just one tiny ray of sunshine , somehow, everyday.

I know its hard and this may not help at all.

Getting back to the plate. If you took the plate and turned it over, all your feeling could still stay attached, they dont have to change overnight, they couldnt, but, visually, tip the plate over, sunny side up, with the thoughts and feelings facing the light, where they could all stay intact just as you feel right now, only, instead of turned upside down and buried in the darkness, they can now feel the sun, where the daylight is, where seeds can grow and blossoms can bloom.

I know it hurts.

Thank you, thank you, thank you. I'm not happy that you hurt, but it helps to know that someone really understands.

I finally decided, Jean17, that unless I took control of my life (or let God handle it all
for me, as I should really do), things were not going to improve. So I've made it a
challenge for my life to watch myself, notice my triggers, work them out with prayer,
diet changes, "the lemon thing" and small dosage of Prozac.

Accepting the fact that everyone has problems in life and that we are not alone in
having a depressive illness, has encouraged me to keep working at it as long as I live.
I finally chose some real respect for a spiritual view of life, and like Emmet Fox says,
(he's a renowned writer on positive thinking and spirituality) there's nothing that
psychotherapy can do for us that prayer cannot do equally as well or better than
therapy.

His is a very sound approach to life and all the "slings and arrows" thrown our way.
And he leaves me with a feeling after reading his meditative work that we somehow
are protected and covered by spiritual help.

[AV747]

Hi ! I have been struggling with depression for many years, and I say that sometimes it is needed. depression as a protective reaction to many things happening with us! Not one day depression has gone from us. I'm sure everything will be fine, and you'll feel better .

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by jean17

How do we live like this? How do we accept that this is as good as I'm going to get? Depression is weighing heavily on me. I'm doing everything that I can: meds, psychotherapy, workbooks, but I just can't get rid of it. How can I learn to live like this for the rest of my life? I feel like there is a wound so deep inside me that it will never heal. I am so sad.

Wounds, do heal. Scars remain. Scars fade over time.

How to accept that this is as good as you are going to get? That is today talking. Not tomorrow.

Sounds like you are reaching a burn out, in trying to 'change' whatever it is that you are trying to change.

Don't forget to step back from the self help for a moment, and just focus on a hobby--even if the joy is gone right now, focusing on something that you usually enjoy, takes the pressure off trying to make immediate changes in something that takes time.

You are in the throws of you depression, it sounds.