[Eevvee]

I had been depressed much of my life and yes, sometimes I still fall down that path once again. I can feel when it's happening though, and I now have a strategy to keep myself from falling back down. Maybe it won't help everyone on here: everyone's depression is different, and everyone heals in different ways but this is my opinion on all of it now:

The more you dwell on it and tell yourself "I'm depressed" the more depressed you will be, and it will be a vicious cycle. You are keeping your mind in a dark place and feeding it. This part sounds stupid because you may not believe what you are telling yourself at all, but in your mind say things like "I'm going to make sure that today is a good day." Or "I feel as though I am getting better." Maybe it isn't getting better, but it's a funny thing, I'm pretty sure you can fool your own brain into thinking that you feel a certain way. Much like when you tell yourself you are sad, you begin to feel more sad.

The most important thing that I have ever learned is that the only person who can cure your depression is you. Medicine may be necessary sometimes. (SOME people need it) But it does not allow you to learn how to pull yourself out of depression, it simply numbs you so that you do not feel it. So many doctors are quick to try to just put a "band-aid on a gushing wound" by prescribing anti-depressants left and right. I have never been on meds, and I am better now. My sister has been on meds and has never gotten better.

My advice to you is to try to fake being happy. It sounds awful and it will feel very odd and fake, of course. But after a while, it won't be faking it anymore. Of course, write down your feelings or get out whatever is bringing you down, but when you are around people, put on a smile, laugh, crack jokes, and make yourself happy!

Suicide might seem appetizing on a bad day... but when you're having a good day, remember that you would not be having that good day if you had succeeded in your attempt. Things will always get better. And perhaps it's not always as simple as "just be happy" but as soon as you are depressed, your own negative thoughts and feelings are your worst enemy. Go out and do something with someone. Find someone weird and accepting to hang out with. But whatever you do, don't sit around by yourself for too long, and DON'T over-think things. At least not until you get a more positive mindset!

When you are depressed YOU'RE THOUGHTS are your worst enemy. Start thinking happy, buy a cat! Strike up conversations with strangers at the store. It's the little things. Good luck! I hope my strategy continues to work for me, and that maybe it works for some of you as well. Much love *hugs*

[ajmich]

That's all fine and I'm glad it works for you. I hate meds but some need them; the point of the better meds is not to "numb you so you don't feel"... the goal is to bring you out of the misery at least enough so that you can BEGIN to take charge and do the things you have described. Meds don't often work that way, but that's the ideal, to give you a jump start, not a cure, and certainly not to zone out. I do believe in re-training the brain. But it does not sound as if you've experienced any debilitating depression. Thanks for sharing, much of what you wrote is very good advice. Just be aware you may not have the full 'spectrum' of the disease within your grasp.

[nicolerose]

i read your post and i think that i try to do something like that, but it doesnt work
like sometimes i feel depressed even though i dont want to be, and even if i try to do something else, i still feel depressed, and im really trying not to be. i want to be happy but i cant, even though im not telling myself that im depressed or something.

sometimes i really try to do something like, go outside, but then i still end up feeling depressed even after i try really hard to not be depressed. and then there are times that i try really hard to not be depressed but i still am that i cant even get the motivation to do anything, even try to be happy, even though i wish that i could.

[Hellion]

Glad it works for you, but any time I try to fake it.....that just makes it worse, then I also overstrain myself trying to keep up the act which causes me to crash and then my depression and anxiety is even worse. Trust me I have tried faking that I am feeling a bit better many times in life and it never once helped.

Also though I don't really tell myself I am depressed, and thinking the thought I am depressed does not make me more depressed. It's more how I feel regardless of what I tell myself. In my case there is no cure so I am of the opinion my best bet is learning to live with what I have than trying to act it away. I need something little more concrete than 'it gets better' to cling to since I have never actually seen it 'get better' in my life if I believe life can be bearable with proper help and such then maybe I can better live with what I have........if I keep expecting it to get better its just going to keep bringing crushing disappointment.

But that is just how it works with me.

[Eevvee]

Ajmich, I feel quite offended by your message. I was raped when I was younger and I have suffered from depression since I was 12. I have had thoughts of suicide and suicide attempts. I have abused alcohol as well and last year my alcoholic friend almost died when I was with him. I would appreciate you not assuming things like that. I HAVE suffered immense depression, for almost 10 years. I DO still have problems with it as I first stated, but my process seems to help ease the pain and emptiness. And I also included in my initial statement that yes, I understand that meds are sometimes necessary and I do agree with some people taking them.

Like I said, I hope that this can help someone. Maybe it won't. Somehow, it works for me. It's not an instant process, and I never said it was simple. I had to keep doing this same thing for months and months and finally I started to get happier and meet new people that didn't bring me down. I think a lot of people's depression is different... I wish it worked for more people!

[Poppy Princess]

My heart aches for you, Eevve. Sometimes this method does work for me. If I can fake happiness enough I can convince myself I am happy. Then I really am happy. Maybe it works for me because I'm often faking stuff. I fake various personalities, try to be people I'll never be. I can fake almost anything until it's real. I sometimes slip back into reality but not often.

You're pain is so much more real than mine though. I'm just an over privileged middle class American in the end. I'm not being snarky or sarcastic, I mean that. I've never been raped and I don't know what kind of pain must go with that. If I had to choose between my happiness and yours... I'd give it all to you. You deserve happiness more than I ever will. I send you my prayers and blessings, love <3

[Eevvee]

Poppy Princess I have no doubt that your depression is just as real as mine! Everyone goes through hard times, and if the most difficult thing you have gone through is not that bad, then it seems so much worse than it really is. If your situation is the most unhappy it's ever been, then of course you're going to be feeling a lot of pain and sadness I'm sure some people have gone through much worse than me and have felt very depressed as well... Thank you for the compassion <3

I'm glad that this method works for someone else as well! I hope that maybe other people will read this and try it, and hopefully it will work for some others out there.