[LilyInHerHand]

Hello all!
To get to the point, I have improved tremendously with my emotional symptoms of depression. I no longer self harm or have disordered eating. The thing is, I still have all sorts of physical symptoms where I can still feel the depression lingering. The most profound one being the fatigue. I am always just so tired! No matter if I get 3, 8, or 10 hours of sleep, I am always exhausted. I feel so heavy and as if I am melting or sinking into the ground as I walk or sit. It takes a lot of energy to lift my arms. I live a very busy life right now, due to school, work, and my internship, and I always feel too exhausted to enjoy any time for myself.

Then there is the other side of things. I get extremely anxious and sometimes have small panic attacks. There are times where I just get so tense and my heart feels like it is going to beat out of my chest (or explode, whichever comes first). This leads into the panic attacks. I am always just worried that someone is watching me or really that there is a negative energy (or spirit, if you will) is watching or following me. This causes a lot of my anxiety. Also, all of the stress that I have going on in my life. Even though my heart is racing and I am basically freaking out, I am still feeling super heavy and fatigued. I feel like since I am so anxious, I should feel more alert and high paced, but I am still so sluggish. I am no longer on any medication for anything, by the way.

I have no clue if any of that makes sense, but hopefully someone understands! It is just all so conflicting, it is sometimes hard to know what is going on with my body. Has anyone experienced this? Or any suggestions on what I should do?

[bharani1008]

My depression was and is always accompanied by anxiety. Like you even though the depression is under control, the anxiety still lingers. The only way I am able to control it is with medication. I take 0.5 mg of Alprax. I have never been able to get relief through breathing or visualizing unfortunately. I think my body is so used to reacting to anxiety that it is almost a reflex. I've had anxiety attacks all my life.
Not good news, huh?
Anyway thought I'd share this in case it helps

[Rohag]

I'm also living with depression and anxiety.

Originally Posted by LilyInHerHand

I live a very busy life right now, due to school, work, and my internship, and I always feel too exhausted to enjoy any time for myself.

Can you assess the effect of your activities - individually and collectively - on your anxiety? Exhaustion and a lack of personal time to regroup helps neither depression nor anxiety. Do you have any opportunity to restructure things to allow for more recovery time, or is there a way to enhance the restorative power of the few down times you already have?

[LilyInHerHand]

Rohag- Unfortunately, I have to complete all of these things at once. I work very little hours a week and my school classes and my internship has to be completed at the same time. Thankfully, I graduate in August so I only have a month left of that craziness. You bring up a good point for me though, to enhance the restorative power of my down time. I have some down time after my internship at an agency and prior to making dinner for my fiance and I. A lot of times, I end up taking a nap because I am so exhausted. So that is really my only "me" time. I try to spend as much time as possible with my fiance on the weekends because we don't see each other much during the week, other than a late dinner. Even though I spend time trying to energize myself, it still doesn't help.

bharani- I'm thinking I might need to see a doctor to see if I could benefit from anxiety medication. It drives me nuts when people suggest deep breathing or visualizing. It does not work for me and it stresses me out more, usually causing a panic attack. It is frustrating. I was on medication for depression, but it did not seem to help me too much and really upset my stomach, which makes me more hesitant to seek medication for the anxiety.

[LilyInHerHand]

Oh, and thanks for your insights!

[healingme4me]

Originally Posted by LilyInHerHand

I'm thinking I might need to see a doctor to see if I could benefit from anxiety medication. It drives me nuts when people suggest deep breathing or visualizing. It does not work for me and it stresses me out more, usually causing a panic attack. It is frustrating. I was on medication for depression, but it did not seem to help me too much and really upset my stomach, which makes me more hesitant to seek medication for the anxiety.

I am surprised your doctor didn't treat you with a medication that can ease both depression and anxiety symptoms, at the same time?

Also, are you receiving annual physicals by a primary doctor? Someone to monitor, the fatigue you are feeling, to make certain there isn't some physical causes? For example, something as minor as anemia can cause fatigue. One thing, I know, got to cover every angle, it's easy enough to brush off fatigue as depression related, when it can be physically related, and vice versa.

I soooooo, get what you mean, about the breathing techniques aspect!! Heart palpitations are no fun!! And yeah, even if they don't cause a panic attack, those also, can be a source of exhaustion.

I still need to bring up the near fainting/dizzy spells that I was planning to bring up to my pdoc, when I see him next. I'd had a physical with all kinds of bloodwork which the results came in a little around after my last pdoc appointment. What I mean by still 'need to' bring this up, is that in between visits, I had a phone consult with my pdoc, and was prescribed .25mg alprazolam and bingo, that stopped! Was having panic attacks taking a shower, and my primary, actually wanted to brush that aside as my MS. Go figure!? ((see why, health needs to be evaluated, at every angle?!))

Maybe, once those anxiety symptoms are taken care of, you won't feel fatigued? But if you do still feel fatigue, just take care of yourself, ok?

[LilyInHerHand]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

I am surprised your doctor didn't treat you with a medication that can ease both depression and anxiety symptoms, at the same time?

Also, are you receiving annual physicals by a primary doctor? Someone to monitor, the fatigue you are feeling, to make certain there isn't some physical causes?

Maybe, once those anxiety symptoms are taken care of, you won't feel fatigued? But if you do still feel fatigue, just take care of yourself, ok?

Thanks for the reply! When I was prescribed medication for depression, I wasn't really having much of a problem with anxiety. I was actually being hospitalized after a suicide attempt. I know that I had a few panic attacks every so often, but it was no where near as bad as it is now. Maybe since the depression has lessened, I can actually notice the anxiety? Who knows.

I actually do not really see a doctor annually. I do have a primary doctor, but I do not have health insurance so I only go if I really really really need it because it is so expensive. The last time I saw him was maybe two years ago or so? He did monitor the depression and medication. He did a lot of blood work but nothing really came of it? I think that now that I am a little older and actually concerned with my well being now, I would bring up the anxiety and all of the physical symptoms that still lingers. When I was younger and still stuck in an awful place, I really just wanted in and out of there so I would always just "go through the motions" and say that I was doing great, etc.

Ohh, I don't know. Sometimes I wonder, what if I am just a hypochondriac?

Some of it sounds like hyperventilation. You can correct that in an emergency by breathing into a paper lunch bag. Just hold it over your mouth and breathe in and out until the heart returns to normal rhythm--just a few minutes is all it will take.

I don't think it's hypochondria, but we aren't doctors and can't diagnose--it's just an experienced guess on our part sometimes.

You do need to see a psychiatrist for assistance, though, so I'd make that appointment for an accurate diagnosis and medication.

Best wishes on healing.

Anxiety usually goes hand and hand with depression. I have both. I feel like my health anxiety that pops up at times causes my depression very much. I don't know if this is of any help to you. I'm not under any kind of medication and not seeing a therapist now.