[Grey Matter]

I have had the same five friends since high school. Last night, four out of the five friends all ganged up on me via text messages and phone calls informing me that they will no longer be in contact with me. Because I am "exhausting". They don't like the "new" me. And, best yet, I am "boring".

They have been lying to me and of course, thought I was an idiot and assumed I wouldn't catch on, but they all slipped up. I became their pity thing. One friend hang out with me this week and she didn't even look at me. Like I've become such a god damn burden that you can't even make eye contact with someone you've known for eight years.

They are annoyed that I can't drink and smoke weed. I had a bad night last week or the week before where I was really scared I was going to hurt myself and I texted my friend "Can you please just come sit with me for a bit?" she literally lives 5 houses down. She tells me "I am going to bed, Grey. I'm tired." Then, like an idiot, she includes me in a mass text to see if anyone wants to get "smoked up". Really nice. Really classy.

I have no one but one friend, and she is moving away. They make my illnesses about them. And the one friend who ditched me that night shouldn't have. Because when she was having a manic episode and took too many pills, I rushed her to the ER and visited her everyday for as long as she was there. When she got kicked out of her house, I gave her a good chunk of savings and a place to stay, because that is what friends do.

I hate myself. I feel disgusting. I knew I was nothing but a burden to these people. I guess I just needed the final proof. I am useless as a friend, a family member and everything else.

I hate myself.

[Rand.]

Unbelievable. I am so incredibly sorry about how terrible these "people" were to you. THEY were being horrible and absolutely insensitive. I feel bad that you had to experience this during an already hard time. I know how easy it is to, but try not to be hard on yourself as they are the ones to blame for this, not you.

[H3rmit]

Rejection is painful.
On the other hand, when a bunch of people who want to get blazed think you are boring, that's a good thing in my book. It's too bad they weren't grown up enough to accept you.
Please don't multiply the rejection by internalizing it and believing it's about you. It's about them.

[diminishing soul]

Teen Idle, In my opinion, you are much better off w/o friends, than to have friends who don't appreciate you. I'm sorry about your one true friend who is moving, that's got to be tough. In actuality, you have many friends here, who are willing to listen and offer comfort. Everything happens for a reason, I think that in time you will understand that it's for the best. Take care Friend!

[tealBumblebee]

Oh my goodness Grey. It sounds to me like you are not the one with the problem - they are. First of all to gang up on you, is immature. It's a pack mentality. I too think that you just might be better without them. It is nice to have friends, but not ones who treat you anything less than you are worth. And YOU my friend, you are worth a LOT. You've been one of the most impacting people on here for me!

I know it seems as if you were a burden to them - but you were not. They obviously don't have a good concept on what the quality of a good friend is - and from what I can tell - you do. Which is good for you. They are the ones who will be losing out, and i'm sure this will become more evident as time passes. I can't believe that they would do that to you, but I am really sorry. You are important, wonderful, friendly, wise, honest and valuable. You, my friend, are awesome. Screw them.

[kirby777]

TeenIdle-

You are worth so much! I have only been on here about 2 months and you have helped me.

WHo needs people like that in one's life? This is why I do not want friends. I am sick of being used. You are TOO GOOD for them. While we know we need help, I would agree w/ the other posters that these "friends" need mental health help.

[Idiot17]

Hugs to you.

[Grey Matter]

Thank you all. Some of your replies made me cry, but not in a bad way. I just try my best to be a good friend, and to know that I was taken advantage of all of this time makes me sick. I just want to be a good friend. That's all I ever wanted to do.

[herethennow]

I've had a friend like yours. He told me that he has had depression before and went to see a T about it. Thought he'll be understanding... Instead I found him to ask me to pay for his meals, listen to his rants, pay for his transport, and do other favours for him such as going to the other part of the town just to get him a chocolate cake. And best thing is that whenever I'm sad he'll tell me 'its all in your head!! Don't tell me you're feeling depressed *gives annoyed face* you need something like anime to occupy your time!!'

I left him and that was the best decision I made. You deserve more. You really do. They're cowards who can't face reality. Someday you'll find a friend who will truly accept you and not dismiss your feelings.

[Muppy]

Teen Idle......sometimes people are just mean. And by ganging up on you, they create a "we" because each of them are too insecure to be an "I". You deserve much more of a friendship than you had with this group. A friendship is a relationship, it is dynamic, not static, sometimes you'll take the lead, sometimes you won't, but there will always be that connection.

That is the type of friendship that I hope you will find. Sometimes it just takes a bit longer for some of us than others.

You're worth something to me ...

[shortandcute]

I think they are the ones with a problem! I'm sorry they put you thru this.

[shortandcute]

Originally Posted by herethennow

I've had a friend like yours. He told me that he has had depression before and went to see a T about it. Thought he'll be understanding... Instead I found him to ask me to pay for his meals, listen to his rants, pay for his transport, and do other favours for him such as going to the other part of the town just to get him a chocolate cake. And best thing is that whenever I'm sad he'll tell me 'its all in your head!! Don't tell me you're feeling depressed *gives annoyed face* you need something like anime to occupy your time!!'

I left him and that was the best decision I made. You deserve more. You really do. They're cowards who can't face reality. Someday you'll find a friend who will truly accept you and not dismiss your feelings.

I'm sorry that this happened to you.