So Hard to Explain

It's really hard to try and say that it's depression. Depression is what makes my motivation, energy, mood, EVERYTHING drop. I could simply say that and why.
But it is too difficult to try and explain.
I just tried to talk to my Mom about some worries and stuff, mainly about moving, and she was getting upset with me about it. Sigh. All I could do was sit and get frustrated and cry because I could barely think, much less talk, which is exactly what she wanted me to do - talk.
Why, depression, why are you so simple yet so intricate and complicated that I cannot explain you? Why must you make me look and feel like a complete and utter fool?

All I can say is I know exactly what you are talking about. No one cares to listen to me either. Everyone else believes their problems are more important and basically look at me as a whiner or complainer. Pretty much I have stopped trying to tell anyone anything, what I do is write a journal on the computer off line on office, I will sometimes spend hours typing out my thoughts, it's free flowing and no one to judge me or make me feel stupid. Honestly it does help, I have tried to tell friends or family my worries or anxieties, and I found it only causes me more stress. I am also grateful for this site, it's nice to know we aren't alone. And you can always come here and talk and actually have people that listen and hear you. So I hope you find this helpful and at the very least know you're not alone. Cricket

I know the feeling. Family says they are there for you to talk to, but then when you start talking to them they don't understand and they get frustrated. So really you can't talk to them. No one understands unless they've had depression. If you want, you can PM me, I'm not much help, but I'll listen.

I quit trying to explain it years ago. I realized that you have to have gone through it to understand. And it's not just depression. I had breast cancer and everyone felt sorry for me but know one really understood what I was going through. There was no way to explain all the pain that a person goes through in the treatment. You have to have walked in someone else's shoes to really understand what a person feels like. That's why I find PC so important. People here have walked in my shoes and some a lot worse. I have learned that sharing with "normal" people is a waste of my time.

What makes it worse is that my mother is somewhat bipolar and has dealt with depression for a very long time. It hurts even more when she doesn't understand. I, however, think, as she puts it, that she's "fallen down the rabbit hole" or gone into some form of mania. I can see a little of that, so that might explain it (considering she has a bit more of an irritable form).
Sigh. Oh well. I have a couple close friends I can talk to who would understand.