Started seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist on my college campus. The psychiatrist insisted I was underweight even though I told her I'd always been thin and had a fast metabolism. But she made me do blood work. Got the blood work back, and she said my liver function is abnormal (it wasn't three years ago when I had bloodwork done, everything was perfect, so I honestly wasn't expecting this) and that it indicates starvation (which, frankly, shocked me, because I honestly do eat enough) and she wants me to come in tomorrow for another appointment with her, and I assume she'll want to tell my mom. I'm just fed up, I know they're trying to help me, but I don't want them to. And I'm not even scared about my liver, I feel like I don't even believe it or something, because I don't feel physically unwell.

I just want them to leave me alone, and stop telling me what I should do, etc. I like my therapist but not my psychiatrist, it's just annoying. She wants me to increase my paxil too, which I know I need because I'm severely depressed, from 12.5 mg to 20 mg... and a part of me just wants to tell her no. To not do it. To just get off the antidepressant completely. For her to stop telling me what to do.

Part of me - maybe a large part - has been depressed for seven years and doesn't want to get better. Part of me wants to stop eating just to defy my psychiatrist.

I don't know why, but I seem not to want to get better.

[winter4me]

Ambivalence is normal. In "getting better", you gain much, but you also lose who you are now and that is no small thing. (I would request a copy of the labs so I could do some reading up on the results...it could help you see what the pdoc sees, or you may see something else that she doesn't since you know more about you and your body than she does)-----It also sounds as though you need to talk about the feeling of being "told what to do"; it doesn't usually work very well if we just do what someone tells us to----------sounds like just beginning to explore the feelings seeking help has provoked would be a good place to start. Take it slow...it is hard to break out of the nest we build for ourselves.

[gayleggg]

It sounds like to me that your depression is talking. Go with going up on your anitdepressant and hope it lightens your depression. Your depression is giving you all negative advice. If you can get rid of the depression and see things more clearly then it will enable you to deal with your medical issues. Hope you get better soon. Depression sucks. I'm an expert.

Originally Posted by gayleggg

It sounds like to me that your depression is talking. Go with going up on your anitdepressant and hope it lightens your depression. Your depression is giving you all negative advice. If you can get rid of the depression and see things more clearly then it will enable you to deal with your medical issues. Hope you get better soon. Depression sucks. I'm an expert.

I feel like I am seeing things clearly. And that there's not just one way to see things.

[Nerak67]

Lab results from blood work aren't very subjective so there is something going on that it makes you mad that the dr wants to treat you. Worth talking about

Originally Posted by Nerak67

Lab results from blood work aren't very subjective so there is something going on that it makes you mad that the dr wants to treat you. Worth talking about

What do you mean? I'm sorry but I didn't understand this.

[Nobodyandnothing]

If you are over age 18, the HIPAA privacy law prohibits disclosure of personal information to anyone (including parents) without your express permission and if you have granted permission in the past you can revoke it at any time.

Having said that, please do not ignore your health.

[CastlesInTheAir]

Originally Posted by nevergoodenough

Started seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist on my college campus. The psychiatrist insisted I was underweight even though I told her I'd always been thin and had a fast metabolism. But she made me do blood work. Got the blood work back, and she said my liver function is abnormal (it wasn't three years ago when I had bloodwork done, everything was perfect, so I honestly wasn't expecting this) and that it indicates starvation (which, frankly, shocked me, because I honestly do eat enough) and she wants me to come in tomorrow for another appointment with her, and I assume she'll want to tell my mom. I'm just fed up, I know they're trying to help me, but I don't want them to. And I'm not even scared about my liver, I feel like I don't even believe it or something, because I don't feel physically unwell.

I just want them to leave me alone, and stop telling me what I should do, etc. I like my therapist but not my psychiatrist, it's just annoying. She wants me to increase my paxil too, which I know I need because I'm severely depressed, from 12.5 mg to 20 mg... and a part of me just wants to tell her no. To not do it. To just get off the antidepressant completely. For her to stop telling me what to do.

Part of me - maybe a large part - has been depressed for seven years and doesn't want to get better. Part of me wants to stop eating just to defy my psychiatrist.

I don't know why, but I seem not to want to get better.

You could always go to a primary care physician for a second opinion on your liver. And if there is an issue related to your eating habits maybe a nutritionist could help you out. If there isn't anything found wrong with your liver from a second opinion I would make it known....

[CastlesInTheAir]

I really do think you should get another opinion. If there was really a problem with my liver I would wanna know for sure and it baffles me that your psych isn't referring you to someone specialized in that area considering THAT isn't her area. Even moreso she said it "suggests" starvation. Meaning she doesn't "KNOW"...why isn't your psych sending you to a doctor in that speciality??? That would make me wonder if your psych is full of ****!