[ToeJam]

Basically, my doctor and the mental health practitioner that I saw yesterday have said that I should take time off of work to 'recover' due to the spiral down I've been suffering from the last few months. The wife has joined the band wagon and suggested it too... all of them saying that my health and well being is more important than work.

This is all good and well but not very practical. I certainly can't do it this week (I'm the only bugger in my office doing work as everyone else is either on annual leave or ill themselves (flu?)).

Sure, if I get a sick note.. and say take a week? 2 weeks? longer than that? what good is it going to actually do? Will I suddenly feel well again because I'm sitting on my tod at home twiddling my thumbs? Isn't that just going to add to stress when I get back due to a build up in paperwork that I'll have to deal with on my return?

I bit the bullet and took this problem to my boss (financial director), who I do get on with quite well... but he's not exactly comfortable with chats about MH (isn't an arse about it.. but I can see him start to fidget and look a bit uncomfortable). Told him what I've been advised and laid out my concerns which he took on board. Put his 'director' hat on (metaphorically speaking) and said that 1st off my health comes first, they can't sack me for being ill. That yes, he too understands what I mean by being ill and does being at home do any good? and that 1-2 weeks would be doable... but if it was to be like 4 weeks+ then that would start to impact on the business (my job isn't hard exactly, but it's time consuming and has a direct impact on the companies cash flow)... mentioned about having to get temp cover... but I could tell that there would be other implications in this (my mind kept shouting 'made redundant').

So yeah... I'm to talk to my Dr again (as per my bosses advice) and see what they mean precisely before making a decision and then let him know.

Meh, has anyone else faced these problems?

[Little Lulu]

Years ago I voluntarily took several months off due to anxiety issues. I thought it would help me feel better and initially it did (in all honesty, I also had some guilt about this, too). However, going back to work was very difficult and, ironically, I had a load of anxiety about it.

I wonder if a brief reduction in your work schedule might be an option? You would remain in the flow but get somewhat of a break. Just an idea ...

[it_will_get_better]

I am on a sick note for "reduced hours" and "amended duties" (UK) at the moment. It has really helped me. I will ask for another one as I am not sure I can deal with work full time at the moment. My job is quite flexible though.

[Clara22]

Hi,
I do not know about taking time off regarding MH issues, but this is my story. Last year I was suggested to take time off because of my health in general. I had a lot of stress because the position I held was with fair enough responsibilities and troubles. In addition to my physical disability, I have PKD. Stress is supposed to be a trigger for cyst grow. In fact, the last doctor before the one that suggested taking time off had told me to look for another job. It is not easy to find another job when you are disabled and a foreign visitor. And, like you, when I was suggested taking time off, I felt my supervisor would not like me taking time off because this would mean overloading for her. In addition, in the institution I work for people do not take long periods of time off usually. So, I did not do it. Then, I had to travel overseas for a long mission in several countries (all undeveloped countries) . When I came back I gota n unknown infection. Doctors could never find the source of infection, but I developed an inflamatory response that almost killed me. I was very sick for around six monts. Doctors told me to call my family and have somebody to come to the US because my condition was critical. And my supervisor and everybody accommodated. I feel that I had pushed myself too hard. My defense system was very low because of my stress and a perhaps silly infection produced an overreaction of my body. Or it was just the stress, because they never found the source.
I think the lesson I learned is that sometimes things get big in my head, I elaborate a lot of scenarios (terrible scenarios) and then I refrain from doing stuff (like taking time off, etc). Then sometimes reality obligues me to take that step, and things do not result as terrible as I imagine and I should have taken that step earlier. I could have died because of the way I elaborate.
OK, I do not know if this is similar to your situation, but I wanted to share this with you. I wish you the best

[Clara22]

Sorry, my English is awful today, hope you understood!

[dumburn]

Remember you self certify for the first 7 days (this includes weekends and other days you might not normally work) so I would suggest that as a good starting point to figure out how you feel. Then take yourself to the doctor and discuss it further. It may be that just doing fewer days or shorter hours could be beneficial. Or a few more weeks off completly.

[ToeJam]

Originally Posted by Little Lulu

Years ago I voluntarily took several months off due to anxiety issues. I thought it would help me feel better and initially it did (in all honesty, I also had some guilt about this, too). However, going back to work was very difficult and, ironically, I had a load of anxiety about it.

I wonder if a brief reduction in your work schedule might be an option? You would remain in the flow but get somewhat of a break. Just an idea ...

The boss did mention something close to this though he didn't put it into those terms - Though we're an office of 3, we're divided into two different functions where the girl who works with us is meant to flit between the 2. My supervisor usually utilises her for most of his side of things though (and I haven't made a complaint about this) and our Boss I think realises this... he's going to try and implement better time management so that she is freed up to help me more.

Originally Posted by it_will_get_better

I am on a sick note for "reduced hours" and "amended duties" (UK) at the moment. It has really helped me. I will ask for another one as I am not sure I can deal with work full time at the moment. My job is quite flexible though.

I haven't heard of that, might be something to explore... thank you for the heads up!

Originally Posted by Clara22

Hi,
I do not know about taking time off regarding MH issues, but this is my story. Last year I was suggested to take time off because of my health in general. I had a lot of stress because the position I held was with fair enough responsibilities and troubles. In addition to my physical disability, I have PKD. Stress is supposed to be a trigger for cyst grow. In fact, the last doctor before the one that suggested taking time off had told me to look for another job. It is not easy to find another job when you are disabled and a foreign visitor. And, like you, when I was suggested taking time off, I felt my supervisor would not like me taking time off because this would mean overloading for her. In addition, in the institution I work for people do not take long periods of time off usually. So, I did not do it. Then, I had to travel overseas for a long mission in several countries (all undeveloped countries) . When I came back I gota n unknown infection. Doctors could never find the source of infection, but I developed an inflamatory response that almost killed me. I was very sick for around six monts. Doctors told me to call my family and have somebody to come to the US because my condition was critical. And my supervisor and everybody accommodated. I feel that I had pushed myself too hard. My defense system was very low because of my stress and a perhaps silly infection produced an overreaction of my body. Or it was just the stress, because they never found the source.
I think the lesson I learned is that sometimes things get big in my head, I elaborate a lot of scenarios (terrible scenarios) and then I refrain from doing stuff (like taking time off, etc). Then sometimes reality obligues me to take that step, and things do not result as terrible as I imagine and I should have taken that step earlier. I could have died because of the way I elaborate.
OK, I do not know if this is similar to your situation, but I wanted to share this with you. I wish you the best

Thanks Clara for the in-depth post, that must have been horrendous

I agree with you on the "sometimes things get big in my head, I elaborate a lot of scenarios (terrible scenarios) and then I refrain from doing stuff (like taking time off, etc)." part... I always try to think about the big picture... but that usually is blinkered in the sense that I don't consider what it means for me properly. I worry about the implications of things and they can branch of into more and more implications as a result.

Perhaps I should give in to the persuasion of those that have my best interests at heart... but I'm a stubborn sod, so I need to know it's best for me before committing to something. I'll talk to the Dr about it at my next appointment (this Monday coming).

Originally Posted by dumburn

Remember you self certify for the first 7 days (this includes weekends and other days you might not normally work) so I would suggest that as a good starting point to figure out how you feel. Then take yourself to the doctor and discuss it further. It may be that just doing fewer days or shorter hours could be beneficial. Or a few more weeks off completly.

I am aware of self certifying... but as a rule, I prefer not to... I always feel guilty for being off unless it's backed up by something saying that I should be off... in part it helps put my mind at rest that I'm not making it up. Not sure if that makes sense... but I'm the sort of person that has gone into work with the flu, having broken a rib on the way to work... and having kidney stones.

[Clara22]

Hi,
Thanks a lot for "I need to know it's best for me before committing to something". I need to practice that, as well. :-)

[Pierro]

Hello TJ, If not working is going to make you feel worse then dont do it. Personally I was off work for more than 5 months, but I had different MH concerns than you. You see I had/have psychotic depression that flares up so I had to take time off work as I was very unwell, but as I got better I went back to work in August and I was feeling good about going back.Since then my depression has become overpowering at times and decided to job share for 3 months. Work 3 days one week and 2 the next. Its good but the money is really bad. You can't have it every way, right? Nobody can tell you whats best for you. Your wife is just trying to do whats best for you as is your med team. I always say to my husband that you are on the outside looking in. Maybe reduced hours for a while might help but if the work is piling up when you are off that is not going to help. Sometimes we can't see what's best for us when we are having MH difficulties. I am not saying this applies to you but I certainly couldn't see it myself. Let people help you.Best wishes.

[ToeJam]

Originally Posted by Pierro

Hello TJ, If not working is going to make you feel worse then dont do it. Personally I was off work for more than 5 months, but I had different MH concerns than you. You see I had/have psychotic depression that flares up so I had to take time off work as I was very unwell, but as I got better I went back to work in August and I was feeling good about going back.Since then my depression has become overpowering at times and decided to job share for 3 months. Work 3 days one week and 2 the next. Its good but the money is really bad. You can't have it every way, right? Nobody can tell you whats best for you. Your wife is just trying to do whats best for you as is your med team. I always say to my husband that you are on the outside looking in. Maybe reduced hours for a while might help but if the work is piling up when you are off that is not going to help. Sometimes we can't see what's best for us when we are having MH difficulties. I am not saying this applies to you but I certainly couldn't see it myself. Let people help you.Best wishes.

Your post is a little confusing with regards to 1. Doing what 'you' think is best for you and 2. acknowledging that we can't always see what is best for us and therefore we should put some trust in the judgement of those helping us... But then that is the dilemma I'm in... So perhaps you were laying it out in that context.

I agree with the latter part though, in so much as I can't properly see what is best for me half the time... I struggle with large episodes of irrational behaviour that disrupts my work (and much of my daily life to be honest) quite badly. Thinking about it as of now when I'm pretty lucid and calm, I recognise and accept that my mh is impacting on my work and that to have time away from it, at least until I have a better handle on things (via medication and therapy) could be useful... even if that did result in me having to change jobs further down the line (due to redundancy or whatever)... a preferable outcome to driving myself to my wits end and hurting/killing myself due to impulsive actions that I can't always properly reign back.

I've got a lot to think about regarding this... but I've got till Monday to make a decision.

[Pierro]

Sorry Tj, I confuse myself! Basically I knew that I wasnt able to go on working but I think I wanted someone else's opinion, but when I got stronger I thought I was able to go back full time. I really don't know my own mind at times. I am happy with the situation I am in now but might not be tomorrow. Yes, you are right now I am confused.

ToeJam - I am so glad that you posted this for me to see. I first saw the subject title and I thought to read it. And then I read what you posted and it sounds pretty much like me.

I seem to let a lot of time go by before considering that I need a vacation. People would tell me that I need to take one. I feel like I need one; but then what would I do? I'm single and have very limited amount of friends and my family is split up. Of course people will ask me 'when will I take a vacation?' And when I do, 'where will you go?'

Since I'm single, where would I go on my vacation? I don't have much money and traveling is so expensive. I could go and visit my sister but that has no appeal to me. She's bogged down with two kids. That wouldn't be very exciting for me. So I would just stay home and twiddle my thumbs. Of course, if I had just a week off, then it would go by like nothing. And then when I go back to work, I would have to answer all kinds of questions that I would have no answer to because I was not there when it happened. And then my job would not have been done right. Someone else has to do my job while I'm gone. And then I'd wonder if the person who replaces me would find something wrong that I did, or would think that I wouldn't be needed that much because business is slow.

[Clara22]

Hi Will,
Washington DC has many events and places that are for free; you can see there are people that host you for free
Free & Cheap Places To Stay on Vacation - JazminHupp.com
A friend of mine uses couch surfing and it has been fine so far

[ToeJam]

Update:

Well, I received a reduced hours sick note and will be working 8-1 for the next 2 weeks. Went down ok at work (at least that was the impression given) and I'm going to try and make the best of the down time to get some balance back. Actually feeling less overwhelmed over the last couple of days... intrusive thoughts/voices are still there but I'm not being effected as hard by them so going to see that as an improvement.

Medication has been upped and I take the first tab tonight so hopefully it won't disrupt me too much.