[ReneeDawn]

Hey, I'm having a difficult time. I have been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety for years. I was on medicine but had not taken it for weeks because I moved to a new state and could not get a refill. I had no idea I had no more refills and my former doctor would not prescribe anymore since I'm out of state. I found me one but I have to wait a few more weeks to get in.

2 nights ago after a terrible day at work ( I really, really hate my job), my husband and I had a huge argument. I got so upset I sped home and began slitting my wrists. My husband and his mom found me and calmed me down. Luckily my mother in law is a psychiatrist, sadly she can't do much for me because of the law. We called my former doctor and she agreed to give me one more months prescription, long enough until I can see my new doctor. There were no other openings at other doctors offices either. I couldn't see anyone. And I didn't want to go to the hospital and get admitted to some ward.

It's fine and all until my husband said I can feel better and return to work.

I seriously hate my job. It really wasn't my choice, I needed a job ASAP and it was open. I have to work as a wedding consultant and it's fun and all, but the constant interaction with people, dressing brides, having to hear their stories, hearing their complaints, having to keep up with their orders to make sure they order on time, meeting my sales goals and to top it off, despite being part time, I'm still never home! I never see my husband. This job isn't worth it. Especially days I work my butt off only to hear the bride say she is not buying today, which in turn means I'm getting a chewing out from my manager and then listen to the "favorite" brag about how she has no problem selling.

I know, I know, "why don't you just get a new job?" Oh right, why hadn't I thought of that? That's so simple! Oh wait, I have. And there aren't any! Not ones to were I don't have to deal with customer issues constantly. I saw a counselor at my old town who said I should avoid these types of jobs because I'm too introverted but they are all I've ever had. It's hard getting a job good for introverts because I have no other experiences. Office assistant, mail clerk, stocking, you name it, I've applied. I've gone to school for graphic design but can't get a job in that because it's cutthroat out there for that. EVERYONE wants be be a graphic designer.

Once my husband said to return to work, I felt like cutting myself again. I was hoping he would see the torture it puts me through. I know we need the money, but I'm scared if I stay here longer, I may do something worse! I'm thankful I have a job, and there are millions of people who don't have one, but I'm cutting myself! That can't be right? Do I really have to live like this the rest of my life? Staying medicated and working jobs that make me hate everyone and everything? There must be something more! What should I do?

[MariposaLlora]

It's a difficult situation because the current economy makes moving from job to job difficult or even impossible. When you add in trying to cope with depression, the situation can seem so dire. Although it doesn't magically solve the problem, I think explaining your unhappiness the current job causes to your husband is an important next step. When I'm in a spiral downward, speaking to the people closest to me, or anyone, seems so impossible. All I can say is that it is a positive move even if they can't understand everything you're experiencing. A shared burden is easier to carry than going against a problem alone.

Sent from my Contixo via Tapatalk

[813i]

It's horrible to be trapped in a situation that you hate only because there is no alternative. I don't know if this is a very good suggestion because I am still rather new to this site, but I saw a forum -> Classifieds and Job Postings - Forums at Psych Central

I don't know if it will help, but maybe make friends with some of the people there and possibly snag an opportunity? Looking at my suggestion, it seems so implausible... I hope you can somehow get help from the people close to you.

[Pierro]

Do you get on well with your mother in Law, I know that she cant be involved with you but maybe she could make some suggestions about coping with the job you hate. Would you be able to cut down on your hours, that's what I have done but only for three months because I cannot aford it. Its at the heart of your depression. When you are not happy at work everything is affected. Your husband knows how unhappy you are at this job, but thats no help really. How much longer can you grin and bare it. Best wishes.

No answers for you..... just a HUG.

Gods blessings to you.

[ReneeDawn]

Thank you everyone for your post.

MariposaLlora: Talking about it with my husband, he knows very well I am unhappy with my job and is trying to help me find something.

813i: Thank you for the link, I haven't seen that part of the forums yet! I have made friends with a lot of the girls I work with, but they too are trying to get out and don't know anything else. One also works at a graphic design place but I'm not sure if she's spoken to them to see if they need extra help.

Pierro: I get along with my mother in law very well and she's been very helpful for what little she is allowed to do. She has made some suggestions but she thinks for the mental state I'm in, another job, one that's not so interactive would be a big help for me. Cutting down on hours is near to impossible. They even said I was suppose to go down to 20 hours a week, but here I am working well over 28. Also, I don't get weekends off. Ever. Weekends I work well over 9 to 10 hours a day. And it's like pulling teeth to ask off. My husband only gets weekends off which is why we never see each other. Thank you for your kind words!

Useless Me: Thank you dear!

[JustForNow!]

I just read your post and hope you can find a resolution! I am now finding that work is getting harder and harder as well. I hope that you can find some connections on the career and jobs board here. Also maybe try LinkedIn. That way you don't have to be with people, just network on-line for a new job.

[ReneeDawn]

Thank you! I've actually just created me a LinkedIn profile and have found a few more jobs to apply

[JustForNow!]

YAY!!! Good for you. There might be other things you can do online that could help too. I've checked a job site called "Indeed" from time to time, just to see if there is something better out there. I don't know if there are jobs listed for you in your area, but you might want to give it a go....who knows?

Good for you!!!