[SheHulk07]

Ever since my surgery, and the pulmonary embolism, I've just felt...for a lack of a better term, BLAH. I don't feel as suicidal as I was last month, even though I've had a few days recently that I was, but I don't feel happy either.

I just feel lost, angry, anxious, depressed...I'm just one big ball of emotions.

I ended up back in the ER last night for feeling short of breath, and my doctor has put me on bed rest for the weekend until I can follow up with her on Monday for further testing.

This is not how I thought it would be after my surgery...things were supposed to be better...less health problems, not more.

[Rose76]

A pulmonary embolism is a big scary deal. I think your emotions are very understandable, given what you've been through. You were wise to head right back to the ER when you became symptomatic. It must be disappointing to find your health so fragile after surgery intended to help you. With more time, though, the outcome may be better than what you are experiencing now. I hope so.

All you can do is take the best care you can of you. If staying in bed for a few days is advised, then that is the thing to do. Try to occupy your mind with reading or media. Do you have some support network of family . . . friends? I hope you are eating and nourishing yourself.

This sounds like a lot to go through and that you have a ways to go to get to recovery. Let us know how it goes for you. (((HUGS)))

[SheHulk07]

Thank you for responding.

I am staying in bed...well, as much as possible with having 2 little kids running around. I have been taking it way easier than I normally do, and been trying to read and just keep myself distracted as much as possible.

This week is going to be full of tests and doctors appointments. I don't see my therapist until Friday morning.

[MagnoliaPurple]

I'm sorry you are not feeling well. Surgery can be very stressful. Sometimes the outcome is not what we expected. Give yourself some time to heal physically and emotionally. Try not to focus on your current status, but instead, try to focus on setting some goals for yourself and plan something fun when you are feeling better.

[SheHulk07]

I'm supposed to be going back to school in two weeks, but I honestly think it's not going to happen which is hard for me to deal with. It's been a lot to deal with lately and recovery from the blood clot can be months.

[Rose76]

Amy, do you think you could possibly go back to school on a reduced schedule . . . like maybe even just one course. It would give you some structure and a sense that you were not giving up your life plan entirely. Having some endeavor to undertake that you have been committed to can promote recovery, if you don't undertake too much. Of course, "with having 2 little kids running around" you may have enough to handle right there.

[SheHulk07]

Originally Posted by Rose76

Amy, do you think you could possibly go back to school on a reduced schedule . . . like maybe even just one course. It would give you some structure and a sense that you were not giving up your life plan entirely. Having some endeavor to undertake that you have been committed to can promote recovery, if you don't undertake too much. Of course, "with having 2 little kids running around" you may have enough to handle right there.

Unfortunately that's not an option since I'm in nursing school so it is already one course at a time, just a busy course. I have a meeting scheduled with my teacher on Thursday to discuss what she thinks is my best move.

[Rose76]

I totally understand. I've been to nursing school. (If you plan on eventually continuing it, I would not divulge too much personal info to the staff at the school. Nursing instructors are notorious for being ever so unsympathetic to the problems of their students. I hear it's not so bad at university bachelor programs.)