[bazzinga1990]

I realize im not alone, I've got a mom and dad and brother that love me very much but lately non of that matters. no matter what i do to try and see things differently i just cant. everything is becoming a blur now. i lose track of days and i lose sleep.it's seems that i have a problem with little things in my life that get me down or that are triggering to me for a panic attack. one thing being is that ...... well my brother might be asking his girlfriend of 5 months to marry him this June. It's scary to be having this much change going on including the fact that my cousin whom im very close to is also getting married this march. why is that a bad thing? its not but for me and my depression, I do feel like im being left behind.

Me and my brother have always been close and a long time ago my brother suffered from seizures which then led to him having some serious depression and then we found out he had OCD and social anxiety disorder too. that was hard seeing him like that. I played the part as the parent alot with him cause i could see he really needed me. I was always the happy go lucky kid who always worked so hard to make him laugh Just so i could see him smile again.

Now it all has finally caught up with me. I was diagnostic with general depression and panic disorder and i am currently seeing a therapist. I've being that ive deal with what i thought were just down days.... well, it's not normal to feel this sad for this long which has been the same for or a year but just recently getting allot worst. I'm noticing how i cant handle much and then i get a full on panic attack mode.

I'm a loving person and i love and care about everyone and anyone just not when it comes to myself. I dnt like change even when it might be for the best. im a very sad person who has become very good at smiling even though im sad inside and is afraid of turning people away from just being honest about how i really feel inside and not hiding. I really just need someone to please just talk to me..... Please

[Fuzzybear]

[gayleggg]

Glad you are in therapy. That can help a lot. Sorry you are going through this, but I understand the feeling of depression and it does you the feeling that you are all alone. That's why I like PC so well. I can talk here and not be judged or be told "just get over it". They understand here and are very supportive. Hope you get some relief soon. I'm just beginning to come out of over a year long deep depression. So there is hope.

[elevatedsoul]

i feel the same way bazzinga1990... hope things get better soon