[Curupira]

I know this is the depression talking but I feel that no mater how hard I try I will never be good enough.

I'm too skinny, I shoul no gain any weight, I express my emotion wrong because I am constsly upsetting people with them. I cannot trust my instincts because my point of view is skewed... Or so I have been told

Gosh I sound whiny!

It does not help that my PTSD decided to pop by for a visit this week.

Argh, have you ever just waned to take your depression into dark alley and kick the crap out of it?

Sorry for the rambling. I am having difficulty focusing my thoughts.

[nocrzytrain62]

Yes, take your depression into a dark alley and kick the **** out of it!
And guess what, no one is good enough (whatever that means LOL) so accept who you are right now (whine and all) and laugh!
I had a friend and whenever I would get whiny and say something like " people really don't understand me" she would say, "...and?" as in And who cares?
Say no to your depression...get pissed at it and yell at it out loud tell it "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore."
Telling your brain how you want to be is a great way to change it.
hope this helps

I guess... I never wanted to punch it but I've always wanted to shake my depression and scream "do you see what you're doing to me? Do you like my suffering?!" But... the times I've imagined it, depression became a humanized, child version of me. She was tired and alone and scared and didn't want me to be better because that would mean she was going to be alone. I suppose it's a really weird sort of imagery but it kind of made me want to take her by the hand and show it that the world isn't that scary. Dunno but it gave me motivation in some sense.

Ahhh. Anyway, sorry I have a bad tendency to ramble. Have you tried meditation before? I find it really useful in shutting down thoughts and just breathing and being calm and peaceful for a while. Like sleep except you're awake. Or rather, any activity that takes your mind off feeling bad is what I like to do especially on days where I really don't feel like rationalizing out the thoughts.

Best of luck!