[StarsMoonSky]

This depression is never gonna go away. I'm totally in a lot of pain. Have to do some arrangements with insurance before seeing a doctor. This is not called life. Nothing I do is satisfying me.

[smmath]

Believe it or not, your depression will cease in time. I know how it is to feel hopeless, but all hope is not lost. I think that seeing a doctor is a great idea. They might prescribe some meds or help you find a therapist. Do you have a friend or family member that you could talk to?

[StarsMoonSky]

i have some friends, but my family members are very far away. I'm just scared that my heart will eventually stop. Counseling helps a little bit, but the pain never really goes away.

[happytulips]

This too shall pass. Hold on. It helps me when I speak to a trusted friend or family member. Get a good night's rest tonight and tomorrow. Then check with your insurance company Monday. Hope you feel better soon.

[paynful]

I'm glad that you are making an effort to go see the doctor. I am struggling with that myself right now. It shows that you want to get better no matter how you are suffering. You should be proud of yourself, even if it doesn't feel like much. Even at your weakest, you are still strong because you are surviving... even when the pain feels like you are withering and dying.

Sometimes, if you let them know you are struggling when you are making the dr's appt.. the nurses will get you in early to help do the paper work for you. It isn't much, but sometimes starting the process is the hardest part.

Interesting because I would probably be glad if my heart stopped (and wasn't from suicide). But I'm so sorry it hurts so much. Someone once said that the hardest decision in their life was to keep living. I'm sure that one day you'll find something that makes you 100% happy but unfortunately it may take some time. I'm still looking too

Best of luck

[Akua]

I think it's brave of you to see the doctor...as I am not there yet and wonder if I will ever be. Hang in there and I am hopeful, for you, that it will get a little more tolerable.

[live2ski66]

Hello,
Are you taking any meds? I know I'm the cheerleader for pharmaceuticals, for me they have worked. Yes I have my ups and downs, but if I were to go off the meds I would not be here.

Some people prefer to go the natural route, yoga, meditation an supplements. In addition I have found that DBT offers great ideas, and it works (I do it).

While you are waiting for insurance and such, explore some of these options. Who knows, they might just make you feel better.

Good luck!

[Altered Moment]

I know for me if I can at least reach out for help it gives me some glimmer of hope. Posting on here is a good thing and if you can get in to see a doc that is a very good thing.