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#1
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I realize that I do it. I put thoughts and feelings into my friends' heads that aren't there. I think it's because I get so easily irritated with others that I always assume others feel the same toward me. But I can feel myself ruining the friendships that I have now, just as I have several times in the past. It's almost like I'm trying to isolate myself by projecting my negativity onto others. One of my friends has lashed out at me a few times, telling me to stop talking to her condescendingly and to stop being so critical of her.
I don't know whether I'm just meant to be more of a loner, these friends aren't the right friends for me, or my depression has taken over in my relationships. I just often feel out of control concerning how I treat them. And little things like how they're always on their phones and how much they care about how they look... it's just so tedious and boring. When I talk to my friends about how I'm feeling (which is usually only when I feel desperate), they're always supportive of me. Only, they think they can relate when I know they can't and it ends up making me feel even more alone. Which, in turn, makes me feel guilty because of how much I KNOW they're only trying to help. Agh vicious cycles. I've always had trouble maintaining friendships. I just hate how aware I am of this one not working out and feeling like there's nothing I can do to stop it.
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“I beg you to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.” – Rainer Maria Rilke |
![]() LaborIntensive, MissAriel
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#2
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You bring into your life what you need and keep it with you while needing it/them. I am a loner and better off for it most times. Good luck in resolving this quandary
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![]() Truthseeker14
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#3
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Quote:
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![]() Truthseeker14
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![]() Truthseeker14
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#4
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Quote:
__________________
“I beg you to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don’t search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.” – Rainer Maria Rilke |
#5
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I push people away a lot too when I'm going through a bad time. I isolate and just want everyone to leave me alone. At the start of the year I was hardly communicating with my bf even though I live with him and was questioning our whole relationship. It's better now but I am still pretty distant from my friends. I don't make any effort to see them anymore, it's all arranged by them.
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![]() Truthseeker14
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