I really don't know where to post, but I have the following issue. I am a completely introverted person. Not only being that way, but I am exteremly nervous of large crowds and being in large groups of people. Anxiety, fear, and whatever else you call it. Physiciatrist don't even spend more than 10 minutes with me to even diagnos these problems or any one particular sickness. He just names it Major Depression. It's hard to make friends. I can't even do FaceBook anymore. Some people have found out where I moved to and knock on my door, and I won't answer. I am also afraid they will ask me to a picnic, wedding, or other function and I cannot find a reason to tell them why I can't make it. So I shy away from them and don't answer the phone sometimes either. The so-called past friends I did have, turned out to be fake-friends anyway. Even the doctors and T-social workers seem to be a big joke, in it for the money. That is another subject for later.
I've always felt this way since I was a kid. It made me very angry when my folks made me go any celebrations in the family. I do talk with people, but don't stay too close to them. So what am I called? Guess I will always be like this till the end...

TY for reading my post.

Originally Posted by abscondist

I really don't know where to post, but I have the following issue. I am a completely introverted person. Not only being that way, but I am exteremly nervous of large crowds and being in large groups of people. Anxiety, fear, and whatever else you call it. Physiciatrist don't even spend more than 10 minutes with me to even diagnos these problems or any one particular sickness. He just names it Major Depression. It's hard to make friends. I can't even do FaceBook anymore. Some people have found out where I moved to and knock on my door, and I won't answer. I am also afraid they will ask me to a picnic, wedding, or other function and I cannot find a reason to tell them why I can't make it. So I shy away from them and don't answer the phone sometimes either. The so-called past friends I did have, turned out to be fake-friends anyway. Even the doctors and T-social workers seem to be a big joke, in it for the money. That is another subject for later.
I've always felt this way since I was a kid. It made me very angry when my folks made me go any celebrations in the family. I do talk with people, but don't stay too close to them. So what am I called? Guess I will always be like this till the end...

TY for reading my post.

Thank you for posting . I can really identify with what you're saying, because a therapist once did a personality test on me and my introverted points were 100% and extroverted points 0%. I feel a lot of what you do, and I have major trust issues with people, since many have screwed me in the past somehow. I would say I am anti-social rather than social. Pity your therapists are so dismissive, because I would think you might have some kind of autism spectrum disorder like I do. That explained so much of the social difficulties I was having. Seems you are searching for an answer, that might very well be it. I really wish you all the best with coping with this, because I know where you're coming from, many hugs from me buddy . I admire your courage too, since you had a Facebook account, I didn't even have one ever. I have basically no friends, only work colleagues.

[Onward2wards]

Anti-social conjures up images of hostility towards people and society. I think it's much more accurate to say you feel asocial (not interested in socializing) and socially phobic (being anxious about socializing).

[glok]

Hello, abscondist. Please consider printing a copy of your post for your psychiatrist.

[Altered Moment]

When I am in depression I am totally as you describe. But when I am not in a bad depression I can be very social and be on Facebook ect. Even though I am very introverted when doing well. For example in one of my more recent depressions I did not look at my cell phone or computer for over four months. I only left the house for pdoc appointments for over six months. I have a huge amount of social anxiety and paranoia when in that place and basically barricade myself in. Won't answer the phone or the door. But as I said this is only when in deep depression which is not all the time.

If you have been that way always and it is never any different then maybe there is more to it than depression.

A responsible mental health clinic should spend two hours initially evaluating you just for starters. Not no ten minute med eval with a pdoc.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

TY very much for your replies.
I know I definatly have depression.
My mother commited suicide and I also attempted many times.
Inherited her gift at birth.
The last time was 3 years ago. I was incubated in ICU for 3 days in comma.
When I was a kid, I surely was afraid to take part of ANY activities. I'm talking from kindergarden up.
Being adopted, I always had the feeling of abandonment since about 5 years old and experienced it from the on...
Being on Medicaid doesn't give me much of a choice of places to go to.
People are just acting the part in their job titles at the docs office. The receptionist once remarked to me, "what do you think of that phyciatrist? Quite a character aint he?" She didn't mean a "good fella" either.
I can't count the amount of screw ups by all of them, and the dentist office too.
They foul up my appointments, paperwork, medical records, and non-returned calls by me. ect....
"Please consider printing a copy of your post for your psychiatrist"
Good idea. The last write up I gave to a past T went lost from my records.
One office place I go to, hired about 5 new workers for receptionists, in one year. They are gone now.
One thing after another. I could write a list. I get nervous everytime I go to an office. Every place is the same. At least 4 places I go to. What's with people today.? They don't know their right hand from their left when it comes to being professional at your job.
My newest social worker was an intern last year. What the hell am I going to tell some young girl, that she hasn't even experienced yet in life. I'll be 60 next yr if I make it.
"Anti-social conjures up images of hostility towards people and society"
Your dam right there.

BUT YOU PEOPLE ARE NICE!

Originally Posted by abscondist

TY very much for your replies.
I know I definatly have depression.
My mother commited suicide and I also attempted many times.
Inherited her gift at birth.
The last time was 3 years ago. I was incubated in ICU for 3 days in comma.
When I was a kid, I surely was afraid to take part of ANY activities. I'm talking from kindergarden up.
Being adopted, I always had the feeling of abandonment since about 5 years old and experienced it from the on...
Being on Medicaid doesn't give me much of a choice of places to go to.
People are just acting the part in their job titles at the docs office. The receptionist once remarked to me, "what do you think of that phyciatrist? Quite a character aint he?" She didn't mean a "good fella" either.
I can't count the amount of screw ups by all of them, and the dentist office too.
They foul up my appointments, paperwork, medical records, and non-returned calls by me. ect....
"Please consider printing a copy of your post for your psychiatrist"
Good idea. The last write up I gave to a past T went lost from my records.
One office place I go to, hired about 5 new workers for receptionists, in one year. They are gone now.
One thing after another. I could write a list. I get nervous everytime I go to an office. Every place is the same. At least 4 places I go to. What's with people today.? They don't know their right hand from their left when it comes to being professional at your job.
My newest social worker was an intern last year. What the hell am I going to tell some young girl, that she hasn't even experienced yet in life. I'll be 60 next yr if I make it.
"Anti-social conjures up images of hostility towards people and society"
Your dam right there.

BUT YOU PEOPLE ARE NICE!

Ah, thanks so much for that . Arggh, I am also very frustrated at the lackadaisical, half-assed, half-hearted way people approach their work nowadays, it's really pathetic.

I remember my first therapist was also a young woman, an intern, perhaps even younger than I. When I began to tell her about my childhood, I could literally see the tears beginning to well up in her eyes. I actually felt a bit sorry for her and I felt the need to console her perhaps, but I was there to be helped by her. It's so ironic how dead I feel, emotionless, even after experiencing these things first hand, and then when I only speak them to someone else, they have a greater emotional response to the reported words than I had to the real thing!!