Family joking about suicide

So... When they joking,& say they'll kill themselves, there serious?

Not necessarily, Have any of them attempted or actually talked about some sort of plan? I am just a bit unclear on what their context is when they say that, like if it pertains to doing something they don't feel like such as 'if I lose my keys again i'll kill myself.' or like just out of the blue up and say it?

No plans... No attempts. There like, ugh, so sick if this... I'll kill myself. Or I'm doing this, I'll kill myself.

Did they do this before? Did they just suddenly start? Do they understand the jokes and laugh themselves? I can't really come to an conclusion of why they are doing this... :S

But i still don't understand whats the problem of just telling them outright that it is "not fun jokes".

Definitely time to put your foot down and tell them how you feel. Also, seek out a therapist, social worker.... to help you through this.

Yes, they did. They do laugh at themselves

I'm scared to tell them to stop. What if they ask if I think of it?

I would be scared too. Can't you say that "it's not fun cause you have friends with such thoughts" you won't be lying (cause there are plenty of people here on pc with such thoughts) and it will take away the attention from you. If they ask any further about your friends you just say that you aren't supposed to tell anyone about it.

Best tip I've got...sry :/

Ok, so... In email she was joking about killing herself. She tied a noose couple times, but they always saved her.

I'm killing myself that's it.

I do hope that you get yourself some additional help sooner than later. Doc, ER, Therapist, but soon, please.

Hope that you're doing okay Fox & Hound...

My cousin said that, not me, sorry.

I don't understand how people can joke about something like this. No matter how you justify it, it's just not something you do.

I don't know either I'm not sure if she's really considering it. She talks about it a lot , always joking though.

Fox you did have a friend or someone you knew who gave you a serious scare who said he was going to commit suicide. You could just say, I don't think it is funny because of that incident.

One thing I don't understand is how your family has not noticed symptoms in you? Can you hide it that well? Are they in denial and choose not to see?

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This is what I've been trying to say/ask too... :/

Yes, I did.And I'll try next time I see them.

I don't know why they don't notice. Even when I'm depressed,& show it(but not much). No one asks if I'm ok.Ever. I hide it a lout.

Yeah, most of the time family don't notice anything, in fact, they're usually the last to notice. But, I think there's a good reason for that in that it is impossible for them to form an objective view about you. They are so dedicated to wanting you to be happy and taken care of that they can literally go into denial and miss subtle indicators. It's just because they would also believe it's their fault if something did happen, but of course it's not. But, people, especially parents, would say "We should have did more". Nobody can ever take the blame for suicide, but people do. Hence, many avoid acknowledging such signs because they fear the massive guilt that would come if the child were to do it, also if the child is feeling suicidal, the parents would even begin to try and take the blame on themselves right there and then, and feel like they've failed their child. All these things creates a very distorted viewpoint and it often takes an outsider to notice the signs.

For example, one of the most difficult people to talk to and convince when I'm having a problem is my mom. Even when others understand my problem, my mom would still question it. I have been diagnosed with ASD/Asperger's by a T already, but I know my mom would never ever accept that. I've told her already that I have social interaction problems, she just maintains I'm normal and there's not a thing wrong with me.

Well I think StbGuy you are absolutely right. When I look back at my teenage years I had all the symptoms but my parents didn't have a clue. All my Mom worried about was my drinking.

Luckily for me they are very accepting and supportive now but I am 50 and since 19 was 2500 miles away so they didn't see it until recently. I know they feel guilt over it and you are right some people just can't face the guilt.

Back to you Fox. I think you know my opinion is that you need to tell your parents and your T and pdoc. I guess you would have to decide if your parents would be supportive enough to want you get the help you need. My sense from you is that they would be. If not your parents at least your T. I know how hard it is and the shame we carry. The only way to get rid of that shame is to start being honest with safe people.

Can I ask you??? If you have a T what do you see her for?

Yes, not a problem. I'm not sure why I go. Personally .

My grandma was one who I sir to trust. . Nkw ? No, she's too judgemental. She cares so much about I look. She wouldn't let me come to dinner if I didn't dress better