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  #126  
Old Jul 15, 2014, 09:52 AM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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I know what you mean

peaceful thoughts to all

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Originally Posted by gayleggg View Post
I make my pledge for the day. It reminds me when the thought comes to mind that I made a promise. I haven't always been good at standing by my promises, much to my regret and I have a lot but I can't turn back the clock. I can only choose to go forward and be safe for my self, family and all of you that support me.
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  #127  
Old Jul 15, 2014, 10:08 AM
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I'm not sure I completely understand this post, but thanks for sharing your thoughts

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lobster Hands View Post
I don't know what to think about this. As of right now I want to lose control of myself and commit suicide. Why would I want to say some pledge? I don't want to give up the possibility of getting something I've wanted since I was 15. (even if the desire is/was on and off) Perhaps I can think about trying, trying is so much easier than pledging, and there is less anxiety about not following through. I don't want to pledge to keep myself safe for 24 hours because I don't want that. (and because I know I will be safe in the next 24 hours) So instead of pledging, I will just say that I will try to look for something better to do or think about for the next 24 hours.

Sorry, I guess I'm just not ready to join the club.

Sorry, I guess that was a negative post.

Sorry for squishing the positive flow, I guess I'm just a big bad rain cloud.

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  #128  
Old Jul 15, 2014, 03:54 PM
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Lobster Hands Lobster Hands is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tea&Sympathy View Post
Hey Kiddo-

This isn't a club. You don't have to join or sign up or sit in a circle amd sing freaking kumbaya. You are only doing this for yourself and if you feel uncomfortable, don't do anything. If anyone understands, I do. I walked around thinking about it for forty years.

Of course, a lot of life passed me by in the meantime. But it was a comfortable place-one I was used to. Better the hell you already know than the heaven you don't, right? And if my time is so filled with negative thoughts, then I don't have to go out of my way to help someone else, or maybe even myself for a change.
I really didn't intend to be sarcastic or anything of the sort. My thoughts were a lot different than what my words conveyed.

What I meant is that I just feel weird saying something like that. I would feel fake because I know it isn't what I want. I want to be able to be more positive. So I said I would try.


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  #129  
Old Jul 15, 2014, 04:35 PM
Anonymous200125
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lobster Hands View Post
I don't know what to think about this. As of right now I want to lose control of myself and commit suicide. Why would I want to say some pledge? I don't want to give up the possibility of getting something I've wanted since I was 15. (even if the desire is/was on and off) Perhaps I can think about trying, trying is so much easier than pledging, and there is less anxiety about not following through. I don't want to pledge to keep myself safe for 24 hours because I don't want that. (and because I know I will be safe in the next 24 hours) So instead of pledging, I will just say that I will try to look for something better to do or think about for the next 24 hours.

Sorry, I guess I'm just not ready to join the club.

Sorry, I guess that was a negative post.

Sorry for squishing the positive flow, I guess I'm just a big bad rain cloud.

Sent from my Nexus S 4G using Tapatalk
You just said how I feel too mostly. So thanks for that, because putting things into words isn't always my strong point! I didn't think you were being sarcastic or anything
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  #130  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 04:54 AM
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New day. New commitment. I dont think of this so much as a pledge to not take my own life (sounds negative). But rather as a commitment to my own safety & well being (sounds positive). Yes it amounts to the same thing. I just like to rephrase it for myself. .
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  #131  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 10:50 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by seekersinking View Post
New day. New commitment. I dont think of this so much as a pledge to not take my own life (sounds negative). But rather as a commitment to my own safety & well being (sounds positive). Yes it amounts to the same thing. I just like to rephrase it for myself. .
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  #132  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 11:33 AM
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Strength and peace to all who struggle to go on living.
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  #133  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 02:12 PM
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I'm going to pledge for another day. I find it to be a postive thing in my life because it reminds me to think more positive thoughts. I can only promise today, because I don't know how I will feel tomorrow. I may be swallowed in the black hole tomorrow but today I choose not to think about it.
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  #134  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 10:02 AM
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I like to think of this as a safety net and that is a positive thing. I make my pledge to kick SU thoughts out of my brain for today.
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  #135  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 10:26 AM
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(((((((( gayleggg )))))))
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  #136  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 10:47 AM
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Here again...holding on to hope needing to keep going on for my wife and my son...
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  #137  
Old Jul 19, 2014, 02:16 PM
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I heard from Tea who said she's still pledging every day and that she thinks of everybody often
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Last edited by Fuzzybear; Jul 19, 2014 at 03:10 PM.
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  #138  
Old Jul 19, 2014, 09:07 PM
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I am ashamed to admit that I slipped, and that is why I haven't checked in.

I am making the pledge today.
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  #139  
Old Jul 19, 2014, 09:12 PM
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I have to keep it in my back pocket and not even feel it or anything else. I have to spend most of my time right now looking for work, and so it has to not be there at all if I'm to find and keep a job at all.
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  #140  
Old Jul 20, 2014, 01:00 PM
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Regardless of method, may all who visit these forums find what they need to keep on going.
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  #141  
Old Jul 21, 2014, 07:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rohag View Post
Regardless of method, may all who visit these forums find what they need to keep on going.
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  #142  
Old Jul 22, 2014, 01:41 PM
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I'm making the pledge today. I waited until this afternoon because I wasn't sure I could honestly pledge today, but realized this is the day I need to take the pledge. When I'm in danger, letting all of you here be my strength. The next couple of weeks are going to be tough for me, so I need to remember the pledge even more than normal.

I hope everyone else is in a better place.
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  #143  
Old Jul 22, 2014, 05:35 PM
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Pocket riders for Gayle!


  #144  
Old Jul 23, 2014, 07:07 AM
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(((((((( gayle ))))))))

Love,
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  #145  
Old Jul 23, 2014, 07:19 AM
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I use this visualization every day when su thoughts come in. It helps. Am I suppose to pledge every day?
Gayle - hugs to you.
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  #146  
Old Aug 01, 2014, 06:44 PM
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I pledge for safety; wellness; no self harm.
  #147  
Old Sep 19, 2014, 07:44 PM
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No suicidal thoughts for quite some time (yeah!!!). However, the roller coaster of emotional ups & downs appears on a regular basis. So, I do pledge for safety & personal care.
  #148  
Old Sep 20, 2014, 08:09 AM
Abe Froman Abe Froman is offline
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Yesterday was rough. Today will be better. By default I can pledge today because I have responsibilities at the football game that will keep me busy all day and surrounded by 101,812 of my closest friends.

I knows that's weak and lame that I can't just do it on a normal day. But I feel like it's a start.
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  #149  
Old Sep 20, 2014, 09:59 AM
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I'm willing to take the pledge for the day.
My therapist and I have decided that I use suicide as an option. We have been trying to come up with a way for me to take that option off the table. This may just work for today.
Even though I feel better as far as depression is concerned, I still have suicide on my mind.
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  #150  
Old Sep 20, 2014, 01:44 PM
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I'm taking the pledge for one day.

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Last edited by Fuzzybear; Sep 20, 2014 at 02:10 PM.
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