[The Fox & the Hound]

I told my friend. I told I was depressed. I also told I didn't hang out with friends because I had no interest, that I couldn't have fun. She seemed really worried,& she start crying. I thought you were happy. You always have seemed happy to me.

I don't know if I should tell her about my suicdal thoughts. Should I? I don't want my parents finding out.

[ShiningOne]

It's great that you have a friend who can have such sympathy for you . My opinion is for you to take things slowly though - you don't want to overwhelm them.

Have you ever sought professional help?

[regretful]

This is only me speaking as a parent...if my son was going through something as severe as hiving suicidal thoughts, I would want to know and then I would do anything to get him help. If your friend is worried and cried, can you imagine how your parents would feel? What is the harm in letting them know about how depressed you are? That's just my opinion. And now I say this as a son...I am an adult, but also a son whose mother is still around - I had to tell my mother about what I've been going through. Though she's not helping me, I thought it important for her to know what a struggle that I'm enduring.

With all that said, good for you for telling your friend. Sometimes there is safety in numbers.

[The Fox & the Hound]

No, I'm not getting help for my depression. She's the only one who knows.

[The Fox & the Hound]

Ignore ....

[lilypup]

You should def tell your parents about your feelings. The above poster was right.
I don't think it's fair to tall your friend and then ask her to not tell anyone. That puts a lot of pressure on her in case you hurt yourself. Talk to your family and get some help. Think of your friend and how she would feel.

[The Fox & the Hound]

Yeah, I know. I haven't said I'm suicidal yet.

I just really don't know how'd they react. They think I'm really happy. I don't want them to worry.

For those who told there parents-How'd they react? What did they do?

I really don't think I can personally tell t hem.

[Altered Moment]

My parents and family have been very supportive. If you were my daughter I would want to know everything and would do whatever it took to get you the help you needed as regretful said.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[LelouchLamperouge]

I know exactly how you feel. I don't like to bother anyone with my problems so I put on a shell in front of my parents and my family and friends as well. I don't know how they would react and scared of what their reaction would be.

At least you had the courage to tell someone that you knew. I haven't been able to tell a single one of my friends or family. I hope I can build the courage like you did. I just started going to therapy sessions though, you should look into it.

[Creative1onder]

I wonder if its better not to talk about depression or bipolar with others cos sometimes it can make you worse off.

[Altered Moment]

I think it is far better to let people know what is really going on with us. At least a certain few. If every thinks you are normal and happy they will have expectations on you to behave as a normal happy person....go to school each day and get good grades. Show up for work each day and do good, socialize, etc etc

At least if your parents have some understanding of what is going on then maybe those pressures won't be so great and maybe others can help you.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Blues47]

I would advise only tell your parents if you want treatment and they need to be involved. My experience is that people who aren't depressed don't understand depression and talking about it with them becomes frustrating on both sides. It would be convenient if people regarded and treated us exactly on the terms we need but at least for me it hasn't worked that way.

[The Fox & the Hound]

Originally Posted by Blues47

I would advise only tell your parents if you want treatment and they need to be involved. My experience is that people who aren't depressed don't understand depression and talking about it with them becomes frustrating on both sides. It would be convenient if people regarded and treated us exactly on the terms we need but at least for me it hasn't worked that way.

Why should I only tell my parents?

Yeah. I am struggling. I'm always irritable with people. I have bad grades.

I just what others happy,& I want to burden them. I'd much rather have others happy, than myself. I want to try to make others happy, than myself.

[Blues47]

Originally Posted by The Fox & the Hound

Why should I only tell my parents?

Sorry, I meant don't tell anyone unless they are involved in your treatment or you have reason to believe they understand depression.

[Creative1onder]

Originally Posted by The Fox & the Hound

Why should I only tell my parents?

Yeah. I am struggling. I'm always irritable with people. I have bad grades.

I just what others happy,& I want to burden them. I'd much rather have others happy, than myself. I want to try to make others happy, than myself.

Its hard talking to people about depressive illness cos a lot of people don't get it, don't even believe depression is an illness and they are quick to make their own judgements and give advise that they think is right without considering your personal circumstances and feelings and understanding what its like, how severe depression can be and how long it can last. I have talked to a lot of different people but I have received largely negative responses. Some make remarks or behave in ways that really add more distress for you. We live in the age of Positive Psychology now that challenges people who say they have mental illness or who have suffered traumatic stressful experiences like bullying, abuse. I think this Positive Psychology is adding to the negative ignorant unhelpful attitudes and judgements of others.

[The Fox & the Hound]

Well, I know my mom has depression. Idk if that'll change anything

[Altered Moment]

If your mom has depression that should make a very big difference in her understanding of yours. This attitude of wanting everyone to be happy except yourself and not wanting to be a burden is not a healthy one. It is your responsibility to take care of yourself and to do what is in your best interest. If it is in your best interest than it is also in the best interest of everyone else. I truly believe that when we do what is truly healthy for us that is what is best for everyone and the whole universe.

[waterknob1234]

As a parent, if one of my children was suffering from depression or any other illness and felt this bad I would do whatever I had to do to see that my child obtained treatment. If your mother has suffered from depression she should have some understanding of it. A caring parent would not want their child to suffer.

[Creative1onder]

People have different experiences of depression and ways of trying to deal with it. It would be good if we could talk more freely with others without being judged harshly or receive negative responses. You have to find your own kind of options without needing others advice or approval. You don't have to believe follow what people say. Relatives can be hardest people to talk to about personal stuff esp mental illness. I told my parents but they don't understand well.

[monkeybruv]

[QUOTE=The Fox & the Hound;3939333]Why should I only tell my parents?

Yeah. I am struggling. I'm always irritable with people. I have bad grades.

I just what others happy,& I want to burden them. I'd much rather have others happy, than myself. I want to try to make others happy, than myself.[/QUO

I think you should tell them about how it's affecting your schoolwork etc, and get an appointment with a doctor (maybe they'll make one for you). Then the doctor is who you can tell about the suicidal thoughts. Someone needs to know, so they can help you - if you think worrying people close to you will make things harder, the doctor's your best bet.

I have been in your situation. I actually told my friend and she didn't take it well at all: I think to her it seemed like a threat... I have since gotten therapy and it actually is one of the best things! Believe me! It may not make the feelings go away, but you will have a confidant to talk to whose job it is to listen. And who won't tell your parents. You may find that all you need is someone to confide in on a regular basis. You may find you need medication that can help you feel normal and not horrible all the time.
In the meantime, as a precaution please get rid of anything you might use...pills etc...The one good thing about telling you're parents is that if they are understanding, they can help you plan for safety in case you have a really bad day. Your friend may not be able to help you in that way...
Also if you think that you are a burden somehow, that is the depression lying to you. Your parents love you, and if they think you are happy please tell them otherwise!!! They cannot read your mind no matter how much you want them to, and it is their job to worry about and care for you. If you see a professional then you don't have to tell your parents about the suicidal thoughts right away.

[NowhereUSA]

i am a parent. i am a person who struggles with depression. you bet your a$s that if my son was depressed i would want to know. i would love him to pieces, i would help him get help and i would help him the whole way.

please. talk to your parents. tell them you want to see a t. untreated depression only gets worse, i'm speaking from experience.

[Notoriousglo]

Originally Posted by NowhereUSA

i am a parent. i am a person who struggles with depression. you bet your a$s that if my son was depressed i would want to know. i would love him to pieces, i would help him get help and i would help him the whole way.

please. talk to your parents. tell them you want to see a t. untreated depression only gets worse, i'm speaking from experience.

Wish you were my parent.

[Idiot17]

Most parents would only understand if they have experienced mh as well. Then they would try to help you out the best they can.
You stated that your mother has depression. So i would THINK it's safe to tell her about your depression and suicidal ideation as she can relate to some of the feelings.

[Creative1onder]

Unfortunately not everyone has good experience of talking to their family about their illness. There are people who have not felt listened to, understood, or supported that doesn't mean they don't love and care about you they just don't know what its like to struggle and suffer with depressive illness. They can be in denial. And they can say harsh critical unhelpful things as well without realising. Even if you live with them, and talk about it they won't nec believe/take you seriously or understand. You can try though, but don't expect too much from them its not their job to manage your illness , that's down to you learning about it more and finding own ways of coping.I feel that you shouldnt only tell your parents. You don't have to keep it all bottled up contained that's destructive. We have a right to voice our feelings express ourselves freely. Let others know what we go through. Can't force people to listen or understand though I mean depression is complex cos its different for different people. Its important to have supportive people. About seeing therapist, you have to find one that you feel is genuinely understanding, caring and supportive who you feel comfortable opening up to and can trust, who isn't judgemental critical making you feel bad about yourself cos its not your fault you have depression. But I have met counsellors/therapists who don't believe in mental illnesses like Bipolar, they don't like labels and they focus more on challenging negative thoughts and behaviours of people.