[Invisible2Everyone]

Family. These past two years have been hell. Last February I watched my mother take her last breath. In July, a deer ran in front of my car and it was a written off, and then, in September, I lost my job. Without any income for eleven months, I have had to sell my home of 31 years. I find myself alone. Packing, alone. I have horses I love that I have to rehome. One I might even have to euthenize because she is older and nobody wants her. How am I going to do it? I love her to bits!

I asked my daughter for help because she operates a dairy farm. I asked if she could board them for me. She refused. She gave me a phone number of some woman she knows with a horse trailer via Facebook and said "do what you like". I haven't heard from her since. I even texted her asking if she was mad at me for something, but no response.

My sister, who I have helped extensively in the past year or so, has stopped talking to me. I asked her for help and she told me I should be asking my kids. She hasn't talked to me in two days. I am trying to pack up my life into little boxes. I can't believe this is real. I am so alone in all of this. I feel like I am going away on vacation somewhere, but I am never coming home. Everything about my home reflects who I am. Now, I have nothing. I am nothing. I honestly don't care what happens anymore. I can't do this.

[glok]

Hello, Invisible2Everyone. You are a person of value. The travails you face cannot change that.

I wish you well.

[Blues47]

Originally Posted by Invisible2Everyone

Everything about my home reflects who I am. Now, I have nothing. I am nothing. I honestly don't care what happens anymore. I can't do this.

You are what you've always been...a citizen of the uncaring universe where stability is a mirage. The illusion has changed, the reality has not. And you can do it.

[Ripose]

Invisible2Everyone, I can understand how you feel as I went through the same process. I have been abandoned by friends, family, acquaintances and lost my home. It took me a long time to realize that Home is wherever I lived now, it is not the same but acceptance of the change helped me tremendously.

The loss of the people in my life I have largely overcome by spending lots of time on forums, like this one. Again I know it is not the same but it has become my new order of things. I still encourage you to try to meet new people, it may take time but there is bound to be someone out there who will honestly enjoy spending time with you.

Loss is a major component of living and it happens to everyone in one form or another but try not to think of everything as being a loss, try instead to think of it as change, just another phase of life. Don't automatically assume this new phase will be bad, it will just be different.

Life is an ever changing adventure, go where the wind blows you and enjoy the adventure!

[Fuzzybear]

[hard2bstrong]

You are someone. I don't understand how good people get treated poorly by not so good people. If this forum is anything to go by, you are not alone. Family haven't been there for me and after reading other's stories I no longer think that I am the problem. I am enough as are you.
Take care.