Getting lost in the past

I don't think my problems are so strongly rooted in the past... maybe a little, but I don't think there's any major trauma that contributed. The present is really just so much worse that I end up doing what I guess is fantasizing about the past.

The worse I feel the more I tend to get sucked back into this extremely strong feeling of nostalgia where I remember the past in a lot of detail. Recently, I hear a bit of a song or smell something and suddenly it's a cold morning and I'm a kid being driven to my Grandparents' house. They're making cookies or otherwise busy preparing for the holidays. The gas fireplace is on, and it's like it was yesterday despite being 20+ years ago. Every texture, surface, and detail is right in front of me. The worst is that I remember how I felt. I remember feeling good or something - slightly bored and antsy due to being a kid, but damn I just didn't worry. Tomorrow was all hope and good things.

Then I snap out of that and it's near the end of summer in 2014 and I'm in pain again, struggling with health, and wondering how things got to where they are. I get this feeling like it's all futile. The last time I felt OK is just so long ago, and I can't go back.

I get what I'm supposed to do: focus on the present, the future, find something in each day, etc. I get that we see things in the past with rose colored glasses, but it's hard to be accepting of everything. I can be OK for a little bit, but I'm basically at the limit of what I can deal with. Each time something new "bad" comes along with my health or otherwise, it basically tips me over the edge and I feel horrible. I mentally retreat into the past a lot for comfort.

Anyone else go through this? What do you do to deal?

I get very lost in the past...I'll be looking for some responses on how others deal with it because my thoughts are really a mess right now. I don't look so far back to being a youngster; rather, I look back to a year ago when depression was not a part of my life. Now it feels like it consumes my existence.

I deal with it to some degree by daily prayer (that's important to me, and I know that it's not for everyone); I try to focus my thoughts on the "right now" (not always successful).

I wish you well and hope that you find some comfort during your day.

Dang I wish I could remember my pretty happy childhood that vividly and escape into it. I have been slipping lately and today I was laying down and trying to escape in fantasy to a nice place and just could not really do it. I don't think it is a horrible way to cope and distract yourself. Of course it is just an escape though and doesn't do much to solve the present issues as you have said. There are worse ways to escape though.

The older I get the more I wander into the past. I had a miserable childhood but I remember some good things.
Have you tried writing down some of your memories? I started writing a blog and have found it to be very helpful.

I find myself going back the past a lot. Especially when I listen to music that I choose to listen to. It would be music of the 1970's that would do it for me. It reminds me of when I was a teen and young adult.

I felt like back then life was OK. It seemed like:

• I had no worries
• No health issues with me and just about everyone else around me
• Life seemed more carefree
• Traveled some
• I was young and (probably) better looking
• There were opportunities to find that "someone"
• Having a lot of life ahead

And now it feels like the hopes, dreams, and accomplishments that I banked on just didn't materialize. Also it seems like my world and "the world" is in more of a mess and disappointments than before. Wanting to end my life was not thinkable. Now I almost feel like there's nothing much to go on for.

• No possibility of a mate now
• Friends are hard to make
• My parents are gone
• Family has split up
• The world doesn't feel secure now
• Other issues.