Feeling Low

In general the holidays bring about depressive feelings for people. I thought I was going to be OK until today. I was on FB ('fake book') and saw pictures of 'friends/acquaintances' at a party that I wasn't invited to. Granted I don't need to be invited to every get together it just hurts. I'm good enough to receive an invitation to a 'buy something party' but that's about it.

Unfortunately I live in a small town and it can feel very isolating at times when you feel like an outsider.

I keep putting myself out there sending invites to people for getting together so that helps. It just hurts when no one asks you to do something in return.

Many times I get the familiar 'we should get together' and no one makes the effort to contact me yet I constantly see their social life on FB. I also get the 'I don't get to see anyone' yet I see otherwise on FB.

I understand some of this may just be my perception but it's hard feeling this way.

I'm feeling hopeless and sad/depressed. I want nothing more to cry and isolate myself from the world. Unfortunately I have to put on a smile and pretend. I'm a mom and a wife. I was looking forward to the holidays and now I have this dark cloud over me. I'm hoping this cloud passes soon. This is not a good place to be.

(((((Geez)))))