[BPgf]

Has depression made you leave your significant other, or want to leave them? If so, did you feel stupid and guilty for doing so when the fog lifted? What's with the damn urge to leave anyway?! Do you just search out negatives and blame them for how lousy you feel? I feel so stupid.

[Crazy Hitch]

(((BPgf)))



Please do not feel stupid for thinking this.

I know its easier said than done for me to type this.

It can be hard to accept what I am typing.

But you are not stupid at all.

I promise.

Depression does this.

It makes us think all sorts of things.

This chemical imbalance can certainly be responsible for making us believe we should leave our significant other because we are better off with no one or we should leave our significant other because our relationship is going nowhere or we should leave our significant other for a different reason.

This is Depression "Speech".

Depression Speech can speak all sorts of things to us.

I have learnt to forgive my Depression Speech.

My Depression Speech has spoken so many things to me in my lifetime.

I hope that this helps.

I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone with Depression Speech.

[AnomalousCarrotCake]

Originally Posted by BPgf

Has depression made you leave your significant other, or want to leave them? If so, did you feel stupid and guilty for doing so when the fog lifted? What's with the damn urge to leave anyway?! Do you just search out negatives and blame them for how lousy you feel? I feel so stupid.

Other people are going to answer this differently, I suspect... but it really depends on the relationship.

I've had a few big blocks of depression in my life -- some major, some minor.

I have felt alienated from others in general when I was severely depressed. When it's that severe, I can't emotionally connect to others, from my SO to my friends etc. I am stuck in my own head, and viewing everything through depression-tinted glasses. I begin to view everything negatively, and that includes my relationships... Even if they were okay, running smoothly before, I begin inflating the faults and imperfections in them.

That said, I've also had one major depressive episode that was triggered by my then (now ex) husband doing things which hurt me, and repeatedly not responding to requests to change his ways. He broke his commitment to me (and even to himself).

Without getting into all the details, I was on antidepressants, seeing a therapist, and endlessly depressed and frustrated with my life while dealing with this relationship. One day, though, I sorta 'woke up' and decided I'd had enough.

He really wasn't going to change. I told him I wanted a divorce. I felt very sad, sure -- but after a couple of weeks while he prepared to box his things and move out, I began feeling better. I stopped my antidepressants and felt even more like my old self after that (I continued therapy).

While it was hard, I knew I had made the right decision. A weight was lifted off my shoulders.

Based on my experience, I've learned I have to be careful not to blame my depression for my view of everything, and spend serious amounts of time thinking about how I got depressed in the first place. If there are solid reasons I can point to for continuing to be depressed -- even while in treatment -- change is needed.

Historically, my depression seems to be more situational than biological. I mostly get depressed due to being stressed for a long time in a situation that seems to never end or find closure. I don't seem to get the kind of depression when everything in life is going fine -- wonderful even -- and I can't figure out for the life of me why I still feel like crap.

So for me, it is probably prudent to take a step back and review what's happening in my life and change it more often than not.

[copingwithlife]

Originally Posted by BPgf

Has depression made you leave your significant other, or want to leave them? If so, did you feel stupid and guilty for doing so when the fog lifted? What's with the damn urge to leave anyway?! Do you just search out negatives and blame them for how lousy you feel? I feel so stupid.

This one's hard for me. I'm actually in tears because I'm having an issue with my significant partner leaving me because of my emotions. He hasn't done so yet, but he's going to I suspect this week. I'm holding on still for that glimmer that he still might love me.

If you have someone who really loves you and is strong enough to help you through depression, don't leave them. It's bad enough to go through depression alone, having that one special person there to help eases the pain. I've gone through episodes alone and I wish I would have had someone there for me.