[Sirensong18]

So my Therapist says I need to be more assertive in my relationship. I have no idea where to start. First, I don't even know what I want most of the time. I feel like I don't know who I am anymore... so how am I supposed to be assertive and ask for what I want or need when I have no clue what that is?

I would appreciate any resources or ideas you all might have. Thanks.

[kaliope]

how about small decisions like what to watch on tv, what to eat for dinner, to go out by yourself, when to go to bed. i see a lot of women, myself included at one time, who used to let my partner make all these decisions for me. i did whatever he wanted and my opinion didnt see to matter much. i now do whatever i want and think i will stay single forever because i dont want to give this freedom up every again.

[puzzclar]

I think it also comes down to boundaries that we set for ourselves. It takes time to develop this skill of assertiveness, and it is a skill. Start with small things, like Kaliope said. Then get to the bigger stuff as the skill develops.