[ShantheArtist23]

Well, here I am, not even a month after I've turned 18, and Already I'm ready to *********. Now... I don't want to ***... but the thoughts are strong. They're so bad sometimes. I see myself doing bad things. Anxiety makes it worse, obviously. Ten times worse. I've been given anxiety medication but I'm too afraid to take it. I almost went back to self harming the other night, but I tried my hardest to put the blades back down, and I did... but they're getting stronger. It's harder to avoid them. I worry either way. I want to cut so bad... to literally give me something outside f my body to worry about... but that's the thing!!! Then I'll worry about the cuts getting infected and dying. My mom told me maybe I should go for an evaluation...to see if they can find anything else wrong maybe... that could be anyway. That's why I'm wondering if it's time to go inpatient again... I haven't been for two years since the first time... I'm scared. What are adult wards like? Are there good ones? Will being 18 out me I'm adoscelent or adult? What were your experiences? These are some things I'd like to know... thank you im advance.

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by ShantheArtist23

My mom told me maybe I should go for an evaluation...to see if they can find anything else wrong maybe

This is sound advice. For example, see this 2011 WSJ article: Confusing Medical Ailments With Mental Illness

More than 100 medical disorders can masquerade as psychological conditions, according to Harvard psychiatrist Barbara Schildkrout, who cited these examples among others in "Unmasking Psychological Symptoms," a book aimed at helping therapists broaden their diagnostic skills.

It is possible mental illnesses can be intertwined with and possibly masked by various other illnesses. It can be valuable to at least "rule out" the other stuff.

[waterknob1234]

It is worthwhile to at least go see a medical doctor, then get a referral to a psychiatrist. You have done well to acknowledge that you need help. Get the help you need. Hopefully your mom and family will help and support you. I know you are suffering and hurting. Best wishes to you.

[unhappydaze]

What waterknob said x1000.

For what it's worth, I'm impressed with your self awareness. Resisting the urge to self-harm must be incredibly difficult, but you're thinking past the moment: "if I do this, here's what will happen..."