[Booplesnoot]

I've been bed bound for two days. This bout of depression is really weighing me down. I can't even distract myself with video games. I could go into detail, but there's just so much plaguing my mind.

Before I digress too much, I better get to the point of this post. I've been to the doctor for depression before. I hate going to the doctor for the sole reason that she thinks I'm a spoiled brat that doesn't deserve to be taken seriously. She seems to just throw experimental drugs at me just to make me go away, then refuse to lower my dose when I have unbearable side effects. (I should probably mention that I've also been diagnosed with social anxiety.)

After some lengthy discussions with my college counsellor, it was recommended recommend that I seek professional help. Now I have to go to doctor to get a form filled out. I'm terrified that it'll happen again. I'm afraid they'll turn me away, as if I'm wasting their time if I'm not at immediate risk of harming myself or others.

I've dealt with depression and anxiety for half of my entire life. I could never go to my parents for help, for one is emotionally disconnected and the other doesn't believe depression is even a thing that exists. I chat with my online friends sometimes, and it helps, but I can't go to them all the time. It's not fair to them to know that I'm hurting all the time. It's more difficult to talk to my friends face-to-face, and I just end up being a pathetic, sobbing bundle.

This turned in to a bit of a rant, but what I mean to ask is: have you ever felt like your depression wasn't taken seriously by your friends or your family or even your doctor?

I feel silly for even asking...

[emijec]

At first yes because they see how hurt you are but after a while they get frustrated and wonder why you can't just snap out of it. I think you should explain how it affects you, I'm sure you've said that before. how it messes up your daily routine, how everything takes a million tons of energy to do , like brush your teeth, etc. depression to me feels like bleeding in my brain, its taken over everything. If you google depression & TED talk there's a good video for a speech given by a Dr. Solomon. he hit the nail on the head. it would be worth watching.
-emi

[Fizzyo]

It's always worth trying again with the doctor, you may see a different one to whom you saw last time with a different attitude. If the counsellor recommended you get help, you are less likely to get the brush off.
Hang on in there. I hope you find the courage to ask for the help you need.

[Fuzzybear]

Some doctors have a poor attitude, IMHO. I suggest seeing another doctor, somebody who wants to help.

Originally Posted by Booplesnoot

have you ever felt like your depression wasn't taken seriously by your friends or your family or even your doctor?

I believe that my parents have been suffering from depression their whole lifes, yet they... well, I'm not even gonna say what do they think of depression and people who suffer from it.

As for my friends...wait, what friends?

And finally, doctors... Whatever the reason I go to a GP, I think they only take me seriously if I happen to have whatever they can connect to what they read on their "Big Book of Medicine".

I'm not having a go at GPs, but what I am trying to say is that I think they are mostly unprepared to deal with mental illness in general (or even diagnose it).

But still...

Originally Posted by Fizzyo

It's always worth trying again with the doctor, you may see a different one to whom you saw last time with a different attitude. If the counsellor recommended you get help, you are less likely to get the brush off.

This...

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I suggest seeing another doctor, somebody who wants to help.

... and this.

[waterknob1234]

Get something in writing from the college counselor, then go to the doctor. Something in writing from a professional may make them take you more seriously. Also, is there a way to get a different doctor?

Depression is a lonely illness because people don't really understand it unless they have experienced it. Sometimes it is hard to talk to people IRL. That is why it is good to talk to people here. We understand how things are and how you feel. I have been through the same feelings and experiences. I wish you the best.

[waterknob1234]

I like your screenname, Booplesnoot. That is original and cute. I also like the bunny rabbits.

[Booplesnoot]

I'd like to thank everyone for their replies. I've been feeling less bad today. I only had one small cry while talking to someone at college who is very supportive. Reading through the threads on these forums has also helped me feel little less lonely.

Hopefully I can hold myself together for a good stretch and get through my last year at school.

Sent from my LG-D852 using Tapatalk

[flockpride]

Originally Posted by Booplesnoot

I'd like to thank everyone for their replies. I've been feeling less bad today. I only had one small cry while talking to someone at college who is very supportive. Reading through the threads on these forums has also helped me feel little less lonely.

Hopefully I can hold myself together for a good stretch and get through my last year at school.

Sent from my LG-D852 using Tapatalk

Depression is real and if you are having the experience of not being able to do anything and crying a lot, that matters. Are there supports provided by the college for mental health? Usually they have a counseling service. You don't have to deal with this alone. People care.

Originally Posted by Booplesnoot

...have you ever felt like your depression wasn't taken seriously...

Yes, definitely!

You don't have to feel silly for asking, because it happens.

My study leader at university doesn't take my depression seriously. She says all the right things, but then there are some things she says and does that proves to me she doesn't believe it's a real thing, so too with numerous others. They think it can be solved with a snap of the fingers, just take pills and voila! It's cured. They want you to get "back to normal" as soon as possible because it's best for them.

If someone hasn't had it, they will never know what it feels like. Anyone who says things like "choose to be happy", "suicide is for cowards", "focus on the positive", "you have the power" doesn't understand it one bit.

They have never experienced the feeling of complete helplessness and powerlessness, where things just keep going wrong and getting worse, no matter what you do.

It's easy for people to talk when their lives are just sweet.

[connect.the.stars]

Booplesnoot,

Your post nailed how I've been feeling for a long time now. I have thankfully found a doctor whom I can trust, but the family and friends aspect? I feel like they are never going to understand my depression, and that alone makes me rather sad because the depression is a part of who I am. It's almost like an arm or a leg to me. So indirectly their rejection of anything along the lines of depression becomes a rejection of my true self. I can never be my true self, unless I am speaking to people in online communities such as Psych Central. And sometimes it's very lonely. I know I have great pals here who support me, but there are days I long for someone to just sit with me in my room. They don't even need to talk to me. I just want someone to physically remind me that I have their support. And that can be the hardest part of depression.

Depression is something that only the experienced can relate to. I find it best to explain what people can do for you (if they want to). It can be as simple as watch a movie with you and not talk. Or sit and listen and not comment. Or let you go with friends and let you simply watch them enjoy themselves without feeling bad that you seem to not enjoy yourself (it helped me to see happy people even though I couldn't be a part of their happiness).

So I guess it's not so much that they don't take you seriously as that they can't relate.

You need a new doctor.

Originally Posted by sophiesmom

Or sit and listen and not comment.

Yes, this is so true! Thank you! I'm so sick of people who don't know what they are talking about (someone who didn't have depression) trying to ANALYZE and SOLVE it for you all the time! They can't, no matter how good they think they are.

The worst is when you don't take their stupid advice they always accuse you of not trying hard enough, which just makes the depression worse!

[Alone & confused]

Originally Posted by Booplesnoot

I've been bed bound for two days. This bout of depression is really weighing me down. I can't even distract myself with video games. I could go into detail, but there's just so much plaguing my mind.

Before I digress too much, I better get to the point of this post. I've been to the doctor for depression before. I hate going to the doctor for the sole reason that she thinks I'm a spoiled brat that doesn't deserve to be taken seriously. She seems to just throw experimental drugs at me just to make me go away, then refuse to lower my dose when I have unbearable side effects. (I should probably mention that I've also been diagnosed with social anxiety.)

After some lengthy discussions with my college counsellor, it was recommended recommend that I seek professional help. Now I have to go to doctor to get a form filled out. I'm terrified that it'll happen again. I'm afraid they'll turn me away, as if I'm wasting their time if I'm not at immediate risk of harming myself or others.

I've dealt with depression and anxiety for half of my entire life. I could never go to my parents for help, for one is emotionally disconnected and the other doesn't believe depression is even a thing that exists. I chat with my online friends sometimes, and it helps, but I can't go to them all the time. It's not fair to them to know that I'm hurting all the time. It's more difficult to talk to my friends face-to-face, and I just end up being a pathetic, sobbing bundle.

This turned in to a bit of a rant, but what I mean to ask is: have you ever felt like your depression wasn't taken seriously by your friends or your family or even your doctor?

I feel silly for even asking...

All the time. People act as though I'm just "vin a bad mood" and that all I have to do is get out and do something. Like it's no big deal and I could just snap out of it. It makes everything worse for people to think this is a choice I've made for myself! As if we wouldn't choose to be HAPPY if that were possible.

[Alone & confused]

Originally Posted by StbGuy

Yes, this is so true! Thank you! I'm so sick of people who don't know what they are talking about (someone who didn't have depression) trying to ANALYZE and SOLVE it for you all the time! They can't, no matter how good they think they are.

The worst is when you don't take their stupid advice they always accuse you of not trying hard enough, which just makes the depression worse!

Exactly!

[Alone & confused]

Originally Posted by Booplesnoot

I'd like to thank everyone for their replies. I've been feeling less bad today. I only had one small cry while talking to someone at college who is very supportive. Reading through the threads on these forums has also helped me feel little less lonely.

Hopefully I can hold myself together for a good stretch and get through my last year at school.

Sent from my LG-D852 using Tapatalk

Best of luck to you!

[Booplesnoot]

Just a random update. Still difficult to get up and do things. I feel like -- after the two-day crying episode -- I'm mentally and physically exhausted. Like I'm recovering from the flu and my head is pounding and my muscles are aching.

I feel absolutely beat, and yet my dad's words are still ringing in my mind: "She's just sitting around doing nothing!"

Sent from my LG-D852 using Tapatalk

[emijec]

hope you're ok today

[nikki1060]

i completely understand the feeling. How are you feeling now that it's been a couple days?