[K_vd_W]

I haven't been diagnosed by a psychiatrist, but I can tell you I struggle with depression. There's even a possibility of bipolar 2, going for an assessment soon. Anyway, I have noticed in the past year almost severe mood swings. My depressive 'phases' are much worse and more obvious. Today I felt myself sinking back into depression. My mother also noticed this and asked me what's wrong. I told her I'm just feeling down, immediately her mood changed and I could tell she was irritated. It's always been this way. If I can't giver her an answer as to why I'm feeling like this, she gets irritated, as if I have control. And I can't help but resenting her for that.
My mother, generally, is a very kind and understanding person, but when it comes to this kind of thing, she gets angry with me. Like I told her my psychologist wants to send me for a psychiatric assessment, she was against it and very unhappy about it. I know I'm just ranting, but does anyone else have this problem when it comes to family?
I just don't know what to tell her to make her understand. I'm actually considering lying to her if I am 'officially' diagnosed with MDD or BP2..

[Mountainbard]

Could it be that your mother is afraid of having you diagnosed due to family or social stigma regarding mental illness?

[K_vd_W]

I honestly don't know.. That or she might be in denial.. Either way, I want her to be more supportive, I really need that more right now.. She normally is with most other things..

My experience is that sometimes people just don't get it, especially if from an older generation. Mental illness runs in my family, and with me it's like my family members are seeing depression for the first time or something (not the case). Be honest with her and tell her you Ned her support, and be aware that she may not totally be what you need her to be... That may have to come from elsewhere.

[StartingFreshNow]

My mom is similar. She's very close minded when it comes to medical things/diagnosis and medications. Unfortunately I haven't found anything that works for me. At one point I was diagnosed as Bipolar and I kept it from her because I knew she'd react badly. It turns out they reversed the diagnosis, but still, I definitely have depression and anxiety. I just don't open up to her about it. It sucks because I could really use her support but I've just come to a point where it's not worth it. It creates more stress and anxiety to "argue" with her over whether or not I actually have a problem and then how it should be treated.

If I didn't personally have this experience with my mom I'd probably tell you to try to educate your mom - show her the research and the information related to what you are diagnosed with. Have her go to doctor appointments with you so the doctors can explain to her that your problem is "real" and physical, not just something you've made up and can choose not to have. However, I don't think it's worth it in my case, so I'd understand if you didn't think it was worth it either.

Good luck!

[K_vd_W]

She's even told me I have to tell my pdoc that I don't want medication. But I feel like if it'll help I at least want the option. My psychologist recommend something to help me sleep and mood stabilizers. I haven't got any yet, but I don't know how to hide that from her.
I think she thinks I'm making it all up. I recently met someone who has bipolar 1. He and I spoke about it at some length and that's what made me think about it. I recognized a lot of what he described in myself, that's why I went to get help. But I think my mother believes that I've just got a new idea in my head and I'm looking for attention..
So I still don't know how to handle it. I don't know if 'educating' her about it will really help..

[vital]

Originally Posted by K_vd_W

She's even told me I have to tell my pdoc that I don't want medication. But I feel like if it'll help I at least want the option. My psychologist recommend something to help me sleep and mood stabilizers. I haven't got any yet, but I don't know how to hide that from her.
I think she thinks I'm making it all up. I recently met someone who has bipolar 1. He and I spoke about it at some length and that's what made me think about it. I recognized a lot of what he described in myself, that's why I went to get help. But I think my mother believes that I've just got a new idea in my head and I'm looking for attention..
So I still don't know how to handle it. I don't know if 'educating' her about it will really help..

Did your psychologist explain the short and long term risks of the medication to you and discuss what alternatives might exist? - vital

[K_vd_W]

She didn't, she just suggested it. I assume the psychiatrist will do that if she agrees.

[OneInBillions]

I know exactly what you mean. I think my parents don't really believe in mental illness because they get irritated if I say I'm feeling "down" or "anxious" or anything else. So I started blaming everything on lack of sleep, which is partially true because my anxiety has caused some serious insomnia. I'm guessing my mother also suffers from sleep issues because she's a lot more understanding now.

[Tauren]

Don't lie to her. Just tell her what happens at the assessment.

I'd come right out and ask her, "What do you know about Depression?" "How would it impact you or make you feel if it turns out I have it?"

Would she be willing to tag along to a therapy session?

I think my children (adults) struggle the hardest but they have figured out that it is something I will never be free of. My son in particular seems to want to understand and makes a real effort. My father and brother on the other hand are very good to me, kind, and supportive. However, the seem to look at me as my illness (bipolar, depression) and not as me.

[emijec]

just take care of you. no one loves your life except yourself. if she doesn't believe it then talk to your doctor about that maybe he or she will talk to your mother about the science behind depression . it's not a mind condition it's a brain disease..... I've been watching a lot of Robert salposky Stanford lectures lately.

[lark265]

Originally Posted by K_vd_W

I haven't been diagnosed by a psychiatrist, but I can tell you I struggle with depression. There's even a possibility of bipolar 2, going for an assessment soon. Anyway, I have noticed in the past year almost severe mood swings. My depressive 'phases' are much worse and more obvious. Today I felt myself sinking back into depression. My mother also noticed this and asked me what's wrong. I told her I'm just feeling down, immediately her mood changed and I could tell she was irritated. It's always been this way. If I can't giver her an answer as to why I'm feeling like this, she gets irritated, as if I have control. And I can't help but resenting her for that.
My mother, generally, is a very kind and understanding person, but when it comes to this kind of thing, she gets angry with me. Like I told her my psychologist wants to send me for a psychiatric assessment, she was against it and very unhappy about it. I know I'm just ranting, but does anyone else have this problem when it comes to family?
I just don't know what to tell her to make her understand. I'm actually considering lying to her if I am 'officially' diagnosed with MDD or BP2..

something about Moms. When I was a child and living at home, I felt like the LAST thing I was permitted to do was portray to others that I had a mental illness. "There is nothing wrong here." That was the message outgoing. So, this being from my own mother, I naturally deduced that it was me who was weak. After all, wouldn't my own mother want to help me in any way? No, she wouldn't. She was more concerned (and still is) about the family facade.

[K_vd_W]

Thank you everyone for all your replies and advice! It's been very helpful!
I managed to speak to my mom a bit.. I didn't bring up the words 'depression' or 'bipolar', but I told her that I have no control over my emotions and for me that's really confusing. My Psychologist suggested she come along to one of my sessions, I'm still nervous about it, but I suppose it might help her understand better..

Thanks again for being so open and honest!

[vital]

Originally Posted by K_vd_W

Thank you everyone for all your replies and advice! It's been very helpful!
I managed to speak to my mom a bit.. I didn't bring up the words 'depression' or 'bipolar', but I told her that I have no control over my emotions and for me that's really confusing. My Psychologist suggested she come along to one of my sessions, I'm still nervous about it, but I suppose it might help her understand better..

Thanks again for being so open and honest!

Hi K_vd_W,

There are great things you can do on your own that help with depression and are even great for your health anyway. There's no harm in trying to find things that work for you on your own. I actually think that even the process of actively searching for solutions helps.

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

[harmlessgirl]

Originally Posted by K_vd_W

I haven't been diagnosed by a psychiatrist, but I can tell you I struggle with depression. There's even a possibility of bipolar 2, going for an assessment soon. Anyway, I have noticed in the past year almost severe mood swings. My depressive 'phases' are much worse and more obvious. Today I felt myself sinking back into depression. My mother also noticed this and asked me what's wrong. I told her I'm just feeling down, immediately her mood changed and I could tell she was irritated. It's always been this way. If I can't giver her an answer as to why I'm feeling like this, she gets irritated, as if I have control. And I can't help but resenting her for that.
My mother, generally, is a very kind and understanding person, but when it comes to this kind of thing, she gets angry with me. Like I told her my psychologist wants to send me for a psychiatric assessment, she was against it and very unhappy about it. I know I'm just ranting, but does anyone else have this problem when it comes to family?
I just don't know what to tell her to make her understand. I'm actually considering lying to her if I am 'officially' diagnosed with MDD or BP2..

Oh hun...I can relate to this SO much. My mom ended up kicking me out years ago (she left a note on the table telling me to "leave immediately") because she couldn't handle my "mood swings" any more. Luckily I was able to go live with my dad and step-mom. A couple years later, after a few hospital stays, ect. I was finally able to figure out what was going on.

The only advice I can give you is to continue doing what you think is best for YOU at the moment. Maybe sit down with your mother and calmly explain how you feel and why you want to get an assessment. You could even ask her why she seems upset when you bring this subject up, if you think she would be willing to discuss it further. I've found writing things down before going to talk to someone helps significantly.

Giving you hugs!!!