Feeling lost...

Not sure how to address this, but I'll try. I'm not new here, but I haven't been posting a lot.

I spend most of my days feeling like a failure to some degree, either personally or professionally. I can't really take a compliment because it always sounds so back-handed. I am always feeding myself negative thoughts in my head, but they don't always overtake me, but when they do, it hurts. It's like all the negative in the world around me just attaches itself to me like a magnet amd drags me down with it.

The best way I can describe this is that I have happy days (graduation, wedding) but I am not happy. I don't enjoy life. I live it, but don't enjoy it.

During recent therapy sessions, dysthymia was brought up and am wondering if there is anyone who sees themselves in my issues and if that's what I might be dealing with. My psychiatrist prescribed me a low dose of wellbutrin, but I'm just not sure that it's going to help. I just want to know what I'm dealing with so I can better understand it and treat it.

Thank you, all.

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I can relate to the negativity. I have trouble accepting compliments,too. All I can see are the things I do wrong.

I hope that the medication helps. They work for me for a while and then quit helping. Good luck with yours.

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Hi, sorry I didn't feel able to reply in detail before.

I have a diagnosis of dysthymia. What it really means that your emotions are kind of set so that your 'average/okay' level is actually lower in mood than the average person, so we have the same ups and downs as anyone else, but it's all a notch lower. We may also have episodes of major depression on top of our 'normal' level which can be treated same as anyone else.

I have had better times than I am living with now, I was still low, and occasionally needed additional antidepressants, but was able to learn to see and recall and remember the good parts of the day. I was able to function well and hold down a responsible job, supervising other professionals and respected in my field (though I had to work part time most of that time) I really felt I had a good quality of life and could manage my symptoms well.

Dysthymia doesn't necessarily mean a life of abject misery as, part of the definition is that it is mild depressive symptoms that last more than two years.

You may want to look at this link, bear in mind that my experience is that I could enjoy some things, and by deliberately recalling these events each day I have had good experiences too in my life and the clinical articles can paint a very negative picture.

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I wish you all the best as you come to terms with this possible label, remember we are all individuals, so don't necessarily experience life the same way as an article may suggest.