a help for a depressed partner.

Hi everyone : my name is Saleh, im new here and signed up seeking help.

I have a long story but I'll make is short as most as I can :

I met a girl 3 years ago or so, we became a friends for awhile then she told me she had to take a vacation of communicating with people and that is normal thing that she used to do every now and then to clear her mind, and me myself I was ok with that as life can be hard nowdays.

month later she came back to her normal life, and we got our friendship further, and in a matter of 2 and a half months I got in love with her, and told her about my fellings toward her, month later we were in a start of a relation ship, things seems to be ok and going forward but with time and sharing, as a partner I sensed that she have-hade depression in her life, specially that she was only one year out of her ex relationship as we are from Syria :\ so I knew that this accident caused her to have depression and she even told me that after a while that she had dark days in that periods, .............

a month later she changed in about 3-4 days from someone who was saying im thinking about sticking to the rest of my life with you, to the no contact mod. and I tried soooooooooooo hard to get her back or even to understand what happened, but no avail, till I gave up, but she stayed in my heart, I moved on but we stayed on each others social communication softwares, and after few months we get back in small touch like hey, hey how are you and so on,,,,, it was always me who start the contact.

I thought that she is a good girl despite what she did, I knew it was depression and pushing away thing, now a 2 years later we get back in good way, but she still in depression and she opend to me and said that she has it and she push people away as she think I need to have a healthy person, and that caring can but stress on her, I don't mind spending my life in a hope she can get well and back to what she was before the death of her old lover.

I asked her did she took pills ? she told me for a while but she stopped than, and she don't need pills more like a fresh start, she is in India now waiting for a Visa from the German embassy, if that fail, I'm afraid that she can do something bad the her self, she don't tend to think in suicidal way, but I can spot that sometimes in her songs, and recently she deactivated her social media accounts from everywhere, except steam and watssup.

how can I be a good person to her, without being to stress to her, and is there any clear sign about suicide ?

I don't think she gonna do it for real, as it could have done it in the early days when she lost her lover and it was fresh cut.

but i'd like to know from you, and how can I stay beside her as best as possible ?

and can she get rid of depression with time if she don't treat it ?

thx a lot in advance.

Hello Saloh52: Welcome to PsychCentral! From what you wrote, it sounds to me as though your friend may be struggling with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Depression would certainly be a part of this. There is a PTSD forum here on PsychCentral. You may want to spend some time reading posts in that forum to get a better idea of what it is about:

Post-traumatic Stress - Forums at Psych Central

Given that you are in Norway, & your friend is apparently in India, there's probably not much you can do at this point other than to try to keep in touch via the internet to the extent possible. Just periodically send her messages of concern & support. Try not to be "pushy". You don't want to make her feel overwhelmed. But just continue to let her know that you care about her & that you're available to correspond whenever she wishes to do so.

As far as your question regarding can she recover without treatment, this is difficult to say. It is certainly possible. But it is also possible that she may just continue to struggle & possibly slide even deeper into depression. There are allot of variables to consider here.

As far as clear signs of suicide go, there again, given your geographic distance from her, I don't know that there are many signs you could pick up on. But it is true that it is okay to ask... straight out... are you thinking about killing yourself? Experts in the field of suicide-prevention say that asking the question will not put the idea into a person's mind. It's already there. And asking the question may just be the thing that will get the person to admit they are thinking about it. Then help can be provided. Beyond that if you know anyone else who is where she is physically, you could also relay your concerns to them & see if they can check on her & possibly help her to get whatever treatment she needs. This is a difficult situation. I wish you all the best in your efforts...

Welcome to psych central. I agree with skeezyks
I wish you well with the future, wherever and whatever it is.

thx a lot guys, I will check the link and try to ask her when I feel she is relaxed and not stressed, about if she ever had thought about suicide but when I feel the time is right, maybe if she Move to Germany I can think about re advice her to seek medical therapy, she would be better if she moved there I guess.

thx a lot non the less, god bless you. ^_^

Saloh, . You are in my prayers for both of you. Blessings.

thx bro, god bless you all.

I don't have any advice about your situation, but as someone who struggles with mental illness I just wanted to say thanks for caring about this person. It really does make a difference when someone cares and wants to help.

yeah, I guess so, even that sometime they cant show any gratitude about it but still I feel her inside, and thx for stopping by

I guess things is getting better, she got the Visa to Germany, she is trusting me more lately and speaking up about her feelings and thoughts, she even start to think about seeking a doc in Germany because she never seems to feel happy even after she got the Visa, but that's an improvement in overall I guess.

thx for the tips and advices, ^_^