[dexter]

After a few days of sleeping a little better and eating a full meal every day or every two days... Last night I couldn't sleep once again. I felt like I was having another heart attack all night. Same symptoms. I was pretty sure it was just indigestion but was hoping maybe I was wrong, it would have been such an easy end without having to leave a note or have people question it.

In the morning I couldn't drag myself into the shower. Wanted to call in sick from work (they already told me if I'm having trouble sleeping and want to come in late it is OK). I sat on the toilet for two hours debating with exhausting and sleepiness calling me back to my bed.

The good ending, for today, is I ended up dragging myself to work. I'm worried that if I start taking advantage of their offer to sleep in I'll end up not going in to work at all. My previous depressive episode had me unable to work for a full year... My car was repossessed and I almost lost my home.

So they said I could go home early, very early, but I ended up sticking out the day and giving a presentation to coworkers. Since I've been stuggling deparately not to isolate myself, and quite honestly failing at it, that was a good result today.

Hoping that I will get a few hours of uninterrupted sleet tonight and a better day tomorrow. I asked a coworker to come over to visit me after work tomorrow... He doesn't know my illness but it's obvious that something has been wrong for the past few weeks. Hoping it turns out OK to have him over.

[Moreta]

I hope you got some sleep last night and can function better at work today. I've found that when I can't sleep, I put on some guided meditation. You can find a lot on youtube. I usually do ones for pain, but you can pick whatever kind you want. Most concentrate on deep breathing.

Hopefully you and your friend will have a fun time this evening. idk if you should tell him about your illness, depends on how well you know him and all.

Good Luck!

[dexter]

Thank you Moreta, I got a couple of hours of sleep before the insomnia set in. I'm tired but not as exhausted and drained as yesterday.

[Fuzzybear]