[penguinsing]

From normal to hell

Today I wake up at around 12pm. I smell some food downstairs. So I go downstairs and ask if they are cooking or brought something back (they sometimes went out for lunch and brought something back). And my father said no. I said that’s okay, I will cook something simple for myself then.

And then I feel something in my throat, mucus ? I dunno, I was suspecting if it’s mucus or nose bleed that turn pasty (it’s so dry here I nose bleed).

While I was busy, struggling, trying to get whatever out of my throat. My father keep asking me, if I am going to cook now , because he want to cook first, blah blah blah….

I finally managed to clear my throat. And I gone mad at him. I am very angry. I am angry that he didn’t notice I was busy clearing my throat (I looked very obvious and visible at what I was doing). Other people would have stop asking and wait. But he didn’t.

It drives me very angry. Because it reminds me of his style. He only thinks of himself, he only sees himself. He is so busy on himself, without even able to notice other people needs.

(may be some of you would say, “well he is asking if I want to cook first, of course he thinks and concerns about me, not just himself.”)

Yes, he really really into taking care about me. And I hate it, he treat me like pet. He likes to take care about me in the way he likes too, without mining if I like it or not. Even I told him please stop this and this, coz I don’t like it. He would still do it. He likes to force his caring on me, even I said no, please stop.

And so, the clearing my throat incident reminds me of this. And I am very angry. And suddenly I fell from normal to depress.

[Rohag]

Penguinsing, is it most common for you to become depressed suddenly as you describe in your post, or does it sometimes happen gradually, too?

Does anger frequently serve as the trigger for your depression?

[penguinsing]

Everyone is different

[Fizzyo]

❤️