[Aldan44]

Well I dont know what to do now been thinking about killing myself for about two weeks almost did last week ive been skipping my clases so at this point the semester is lost i dont even feel sad angry or anything just numb i dont know what to do i keep thinking in all the situations in my house the economical problems the tensión between my parents my unemployed brother etc and im so tired of it all im tired of lying to my family about how i feel im tired of pretending that everything is ok im tired of myself im tired of being alone im tired of keep failing at things
I dont want to talk to anyone about this just to worry them just to make them mad at me again because i keep doing the same **** I couldnt bear it again so tired
Dont know if this post will help me but I just felt i should share with someone

[leroysavoy]

what is your experience with medication or seeing a therapist?

[Fizzyo]

Hi Aldan44,

I'm sorry to hear you are feeling so desperate.

If you don't want to talk to anyone, I would urge you to phone a helpline or suicide support line. It really helps me when I do. You ARE worth it.
If you don't want to talk out loud, they usually do email conversations too, someone on this site once said it was better for them than talking and it did help. There are numbers and addresses in the sticky thread at the top of page 1 of this forum.

Also the "ask a therapist" forum here is a good place to speak to someone who knows what they are talking about. Therapists volunteer their time and reply to questions as soon as they can.

Once you have got through the night, if you haven't had any medical help, contact your primary care doc, or a mental health worker if you can go direct.

Depression is treatable, especially in a young person. I really truly hope you can stay safe and get the help you need.