[dexter]

I had to leave work early or I would have started crying at my desk.

I tried to go in with a good attitude today but it was destroyed as soon as I got there.

Someone brought in a brand new puppy and left it in the back in our department. I couldn't even look at it. I was getting a knot in my stomach with everyone asking me to come over to look at it and I just wanted to sit at my desk with my head down. Everyone was fawning over it all day and I just COULD NOT STAND IT. I can't talk to them or interact with them. I had to head to that side of the room to work with someone and I completely avoided the dog. My coworkers must think I am a monster.

The guy that I like there talked to me a little. He invited me out after work tonight to have some drinks with him. And his new girlfriend.

I got the call about a therapist (FINALLY. See my other post this afternoon) and I couldn't even tell anyone. My boss and manager know I'm struggling and know I've been having trouble finding a therapist since December so why couldn't I tell them wtf is wrong with me. Very unfair to them, they would be very happy I know they are worried about me. I should call them as soon as I'm off the phone with the insurance company.

So everyone giggling over the dog is driving me nuts and I can't get any work done and I can't stop thinking about my coworker and his girlfriend so I just packed up and left.

Home and I find a wedding invitation for another coworker... Also someone in the back with me in the same department. I think I've mentioned that I've blown off two company events (including the company Christmas party because I can't stand to be around a group of people. This wedding invite is for a coworker I like and I also like his fiance so I don't really want to be rude to them. But the coworker I like will probably be there with his girlfriend and I'll be there alone and I don't think I'll be able to make it through. WTF amd I going to do.

Maybe the new therapist will have some advice. I have some time before I have to RSVP to the wedding. But I'm already agonizing over it.

[Fizzyo]