Had some melancholy today after reading some junk on letting go of the past. I found it such a piece of BS. It actually hurt.

People ask me to do so all the time - even friends and loved ones.

Try being told you could never do what was most important to you. I turned to my BF, passionate about motorcycles, and said, "What if you could never ride one again? What if you were told you weren't even allowed to look at one? Could you just forget that?"

People tell me to be happy with what I do have - as though a flat paved path is supposed to take the place of mountain climbing. To my boyfriend I said, "Not to worry, you can always ride a child's tricycle."

[Fuzzybear]

"Put it in the past where it belongs.."

It would be great if it was so easy

Yeah, it's not easy but I think your friends/people are trying to help. I get cha though.... It's tough. (((Hugs)))

But what if that past amounted to who the person was a their very core? You wouldn't tell someone they could no longer go to church would you. You wouldn't tell them they weren't allowed their religious books and objects.

So why is it okay to tell me to forget what is the most meaningful thing to me?

[Septembersrain]

I think it's okay to put the past behind you. However it's not okay to do so if you haven't truly worked through it. It'll resurface and eventually slam you in the face with it.

It's made you who you are, shaped your thoughts, feelings, and it has a huge impact on your future.

Moving forward can only truly occur once you've healed. That could take months, years, decades, or possibly never. What your past means to you is different from what the past means to others. It's your choice on whether you want to hang on to it to continue persevering or finally finding the peace to no longer lock it away but accept it to move forward.

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[BrazenApogee]

I wish when i try to talk to people they would understand too. it hurts. somethings can't be changed. maybe someday it wont hurt. maybe

[elevatedsoul]

like for me... my past created me...
my past is nothing but pain and hurt...
my past is haunting...
my perpetrators moved on and have families and no one looks at them with shame...
my feelings can't change... my self has been divided into many pieces...
my world has been broken from many years young...
my past is what creates today... is what tomorow brings...
my suffering is not forgettable.. my pain can not just be moved on from...
my perpetrators surround me... my perpetrators are my family...
these things dont just dissapear when you see them every day...
when people talk about them all the time.... without knowing what they are...
when someone hurts you and expects you to forget...
when pain stays with you when its supposed to heal...
when time doesnt change because it stands still...
people say to move on, to let go of the past...
but my past wont let go of me...
it is not i that chain myself to destruction...
but it is destruction that chains itself to me...

[seesaw]

Justafriend, I understand what you mean and how it's frustrating. From my experience though, it can be really healing to reinvent one's self, and sometimes one does have to 'let go of the past' to do so. It doesn't mean that your past is no longer a part of who you are, just that you've grown beyond it.

Also, in direct contrast, never stop dreaming and hoping that you can do the things you most want to, even if they are a return to things you used to be able to do.

Seesaw

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