[Kat4212]

My therapist has been gone for about 6 weeks and I am so angry with her for that. It feels like she has deserted me and just does not care. She is back now but I am so angry I will not go see her. It is like I am punishing myself for being a bad person. My depression has gotten worse and the nightmares have gotten worse also. Sleep is not easy right now, my pdoc has given Meds to sleep nut I do not stay asleep all night. I keep everyone out of my life and have not been on this site for a long time. I did not want anyone to help me or to care because I am a bad person. If I was good I would not want to hurt myself by cutting. I am so tired of the depression, nightmares, the anger, etc. it has been like this since I was in my teens. In the hospital a number of times for trying to kill myself, depression. It just does not seem like it is going to get better. You take Meds and you have therapy for what?

[handheart]

Stop thinking this way because you will do bad to yourself .Your therapist dont leave because want to make bad to you maybe was had a problem and need to fix urgently .Try to understand this .Go out from your dangerous way of thinking

[Fuzzybear]

[kecanoe]

Originally Posted by Kat4212

My therapist has been gone for about 6 weeks and I am so angry with her for that. It feels like she has deserted me and just does not care. She is back now but I am so angry I will not go see her. It is like I am punishing myself for being a bad person. My depression has gotten worse and the nightmares have gotten worse also. Sleep is not easy right now, my pdoc has given Meds to sleep nut I do not stay asleep all night. I keep everyone out of my life and have not been on this site for a long time. I did not want anyone to help me or to care because I am a bad person. If I was good I would not want to hurt myself by cutting. I am so tired of the depression, nightmares, the anger, etc. it has been like this since I was in my teens. In the hospital a number of times for trying to kill myself, depression. It just does not seem like it is going to get better. You take Meds and you have therapy for what?

I get mad at t1 when he takes time off, too. Being mad about that just reflects that you have a need that is not being met. It may be an unmet need from long ago (mine is), but it still feels like crap.
You are not a bad person to respond to the leave with anger. For me, I get angry because I am hurt and I don't want to feel hurt.
It might help your sleep and depression to go back to t and tell t all about it.

[YorkieMom]

Originally Posted by Kat4212

My therapist has been gone for about 6 weeks and I am so angry with her for that. It feels like she has deserted me and just does not care. She is back now but I am so angry I will not go see her. It is like I am punishing myself for being a bad person. My depression has gotten worse and the nightmares have gotten worse also. Sleep is not easy right now, my pdoc has given Meds to sleep nut I do not stay asleep all night. I keep everyone out of my life and have not been on this site for a long time. I did not want anyone to help me or to care because I am a bad person. If I was good I would not want to hurt myself by cutting. I am so tired of the depression, nightmares, the anger, etc. it has been like this since I was in my teens. In the hospital a number of times for trying to kill myself, depression. It just does not seem like it is going to get better. You take Meds and you have therapy for what?

Kat4212 I hope you know you are not alone, many have experiences and dark days . . . . . . be patient and kind to yourself! Do you have any other local support systems you can utilize?