[Eyeslikeaflame]

I was turned down for a new job today and it's hit me hard. Im in my 40's have no children, am single and I am in a job that I cant stand anymore. I work with inner city down and out people in a supportive housing project and have been doing that on and off for over 12 years. Some of the things we do are mentally and physically very stressful. I cant afford to quit and am so drained that I cant think clearly. Everytime I try to leave and do something else, the trauma that Ive seen and experienced
gets in the way of my happiness amd being able to relate to people. I cant connect intimately and think I may have a form of PTSD but dont have nightmares or flashbacks. I have had work nightmares in the past though. I can't stop crying today and dont find talking to people to be helpful. I went to therapy for a while but it didnt help very much. For years I have been self harming by damaging my nails and cuticles and hiding my hands and now Im developing bulimia. I feel trapped and need to get out. To see me or know me you would never guess that I experience these things. Im an attractive and intelligent woman who deserves to be happy and treated with respect. Thank you for listening. Im sure Ill figure it out but right now it feels hopeless and maybe venting to someone out there in internet land will help. It has hit me hard that I didnt get a job within the organization that is behind the scenes that I am qualified for and would be really good at. After 12 years I have a lot to offer and deserve some peace

[Yzen]

You deserve some peace and better days. You have a tough job. The stress of your situation can make it difficult to see that you have options and choices. You could continue to search and apply for other jobs; you could look at work opportunities in other parts of the country; you could talk to your manager to see if you could make your current job better for you. Keep working towards finding peace.

Welcome to the forum!

[Skeezyks]

Hello Eyeslikeaflame: I see this was your first, & so far only post. Hope to see more of you here on PC. But in the meantime... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit.

I understand something of how you feel. I haven't been employed for a long time now. But when I was, I managed to get myself locked into a type of work I came to hate. But for a variety of reasons, I simply could never get out. As a result, I just kept slogging along until I just finally gave out & gave up. Hopefully you will find a path out of your current situation. You're correct... you deserve to be happy as well as to be treated with respect.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

[Unrigged64072835]

Welcome to PC! I'm sorry to hear that you didn't get the job. Are there other opportunities out there?