I am buying my own christmas presents

It could definitely be a tourist attraction. And I wonder if they used to have an ad in the back of comic books (there was an amusement park that used to advertise in all my comics).

I am not buying presents for my nieces and nephew this year and I will let them know so they don't do what they do every year: going last minute or past Xmas and buying whatever. It is not about money because you can buy something really nice and cheap. It is like to take time and think what the person likes or needs. I do that, I think of the recipient, I spend time choosing the present. But they do not do it because they do not care enough. They barely call even knowing I am a wheelchair user and live with my brother who is not well (uses drugs and so on). Well, I cannot continue begging for love. I do approach them and ask them if they are ok and offer my help. Like two of them are expecting children, I bought strollers for the babies, as these are expensive things and for young people it is tough to face all the expenses babies bring. I helped my niece with her baby shower. But I stopped being too attentive. Reciprocity needs to be in place, otherwise, it hurts. I am trying to find an equilibrium, to be open and proactive to combat isolation but on the other hand I stop prioritizing people that do not consider me a priority for them

I learned that who doesn’t look for you, doesn’t miss you and who doesn’t miss you doesn’t care for you… that destiny determines who enters your life but you decide who stays… that the truth hurts only once and a lie every time you remember it. There are three things in life that leave and never return: words, time and opportunities… therefore, value whoever values you and don’t treat as a priority whoever treats you as an option. ~ Author Unknown

Many of us has been in your shoes. I have many, many times. It is not a good feeling and makes you feel very sad. I never knew what to do to take my mind off of it and finally one year I decided I would pick out a favorite yummy food and order it. Find a movie theatre with a good movie. Yes, I did sneak the food in. Once a year and I'm not messy. That was over 2 hours taken away from the day. On the way home I'm enjoy some of the Christmas lights. Text work friends to say Happy Holidays. Come home and make sure the house looked good, the tree lights were on and maybe turn on the essential oil to make the house smell good. Especially the cloves. Do as many things that don't remind you of Christmas' past if they weren't a good memory. Order one thing from say, Amazon and don't open it until Christmas. Make it something you really want, wait and open it on Christmas. Pick out an outfit that you really need and can afford, have the store wrap it. Open it on Christmas. Try opening them after the movie. First thing is more fun with more people I've learned. I hope one of these things may work.

thanks for your suggestion,

a while ago someone suggested to me well.. in sted of christmas, why not celebrate something that means something to you?

I came up with a few ideas (national puppy day and national lion king day), but then it dawned on me that actually, what would they involve

I don't own a puppy, and as far as I know I only really have the first lion king on dvd, none of the other 2 (I have 6 episodes of lion guard)
andalso i'd still be celebrating alone, so in the end, does it really matter

Merry Christmas, Shattered Sanity! Here is your present!

Best present I ever got was a dozen peach Oceana roses I gave myself on my birthday. Did it stink that I had to give them to myself? Yes. Yes it did.
Did they look and smell fabulous? Yes indeed,
And I got exactly what I wanted. And when all was said and done, I was glad to have them.
So, did you get yourself something wonderful for Christmas? Did you get something you really wanted? I hope so because you deserve it

I got some dvds, and a few cds (and candy)

opening them all today trying to look as if I don't know what they are.. just does not work

when I was married and my kids were young, my husband refused to hold down a job so I had him re-wrap a present I got from a co-worker so the kids wouldn't know he had no money for them to get their mom a present. that was sad and humiliating all at the same time.