[MatBell]

I'm listening to my neighbors laughing and having a good time while I'm feeling so miserable.. It brings up so many negative emotions, I hate it and I become so angry I want to scream. I know I'm envious to some extent, I feel like I've never had that and never will. I haven't really enjoyed life for so long, and I'm reminded of it because of them. It's so hard to be motivated when you basically stay the same place you've been in for so long. I wanna just give up, curl into a ball. People have so often disappointed me, I don't believe in people being there for me, I don't believe anyone will love me for who I am. I've never experienced it. I've tried the best I can to be nice to others, to form lasting relationships, but in the end it never works out. It's my birthday soon, and I just really don't want to be here when the day comes.
Sorry it's a bit rambling, I just had to write it down.

[Skeezyks]

Hello Matbell: I'm sorry you are feeling so miserable. I don't really have any words of wisdom to offer you. I simply wanted to leave a reply offering my best wishes for deep peace in your life...

[MommaD]

Sometimes just getting it out helps so while I'm so sorry you're feeling this way, I'm glad you posted.
When is your birthday?

I know all too well what you are saying. I don't like to go out, because it's a reminder to me that I'm a failure in life. But today I didn't eat all day long and wasn't in the mood and didn't have the energy to prepare anything, so, I went out to buy a Pizza after 10:00 pm, and in my way home I saw a couple walking. They weren't laughing. Just saw them from a distance walking together, and a negative feeling hit my stomach. I feel bad saying this, but I envied them hearing they were talking to each others!!

[Fuzzybear]

[MatBell]

Originally Posted by MommaD

Sometimes just getting it out helps so while I'm so sorry you're feeling this way, I'm glad you posted.
When is your birthday?

Hi. It's my birthday Feb 9th. I really dread it, and don't want to face it.