[cryingontheinside]

Its really bad. I feel like I have no choice but to find a way to escape from my life . I need help but I can't get the help I need . I hate my self . I wish I knew how to stop this . to make it stop forever . but I can't think of anyways to make things stop. I hope I will think of a good way to make it all stop . I need it to stop soon .

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm sorry you're struggling so badly. Do you see a therapist or a psychiatrist? Do you take meds?

[Fuzzybear]

[Fuzzybear]

I feel your pain
(And the pain of the "usual suggestions" of meds etc either not being an option or not helping
I'm sending gentle hugs

[IrisBloom]

I'm so sorry you are suffering.

You are reaching out by posting on here, so I know you want to help yourself. This is a really good sign. Please get help if you can, and get to a hospital or call 911 if you feel in danger.

Hopefully things will get better soon.

[Fuzzybear]

Idk.. I'm not speaking for the op, but hospital isn't really an option for me
Sure they would take me, if i told them how much i wish to be gone

But hospital would do me more harm than good

I'm sorry if this is off topic, feel free to delete...

I wish I could delete myself..

I agree it's good that you're reaching out here, please keep reaching out

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Idk.. I'm not speaking for the op, but hospital isn't really an option for me
Sure they would take me, if i told them how much i wish to be gone

But hospital would do me more harm than good

I'm sorry if this is off topic, feel free to delete...

I wish I could delete myself..

I agree it's good that you're reaching out here, please keep reaching out

Hello fuzzy

First of all thank you for always replying to my posts on here and for your support .
Secondly I feel like you are in the same kind of pain that I am in . I want to delete myself too . so badly . that's all I want

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I'm sorry you're struggling so badly. Do you see a therapist or a psychiatrist? Do you take meds?

I haven't taken my meds for two months . their not good enough . they don't help enough . but I'm even worse with out them I guess . but I just want to die . nothing will ever be OK . I will never get medication that helps enough . i will never feel good or like myself

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by IrisBloom

I'm so sorry you are suffering.

You are reaching out by posting on here, so I know you want to help yourself. This is a really good sign. Please get help if you can, and get to a hospital or call 911 if you feel in danger.

Hopefully things will get better soon.

Thank you
In a way I am reaching out for help . I desperately need it . but as for hospitals and all that kind of thing , I've tried all that before . they won't help me and I'll rather die than try to make them listen to me because its too much effort that I don't have inside me

[wiretwister]

Originally Posted by cryingontheinside

I'll rather die than try to make them listen to me because its too much effort that I don't have inside me

I do not believe you ... the person that wrote me such a nice message the other day was "is" a warm caring soul ... there is a lot inside you ... it maybe pushed down a little at the moment but it is there never the less ... " deep breath " ... tell me I am wrong ... I dare you ...

[kinni11]

I no the feeling I hate living

[Clara22]

Sorry for asking this, do not answer if you don't like it. What type of treatments have you received so far?

[kinni11]

Everything, mindfulness and relaxing class, anxiety management, coping skills , only be back to work last month was of from last July when I went to Dublin and tried to end myself, then I was in care of psychotherapy nurse , tried again last week , police kicked in my door took me to hospital.
Seen my doctor and psychologist, every day I think of how to do get rid of myself!
Had 7 attempts and can't even do that right I will soon

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by Clara22

Sorry for asking this, do not answer if you don't like it. What type of treatments have you received so far?

I shouldn't really answer here but as I think we are in the same part of the forest, I'd say, for me, they seem to minimise people's pain and blame them.. false "economy" I would say

But they don't always minimise, sometimes they are just wrong, I won't even go there

[Clara22]

Originally Posted by kinni11

Everything, mindfulness and relaxing class, anxiety management, coping skills , only be back to work last month was of from last July when I went to Dublin and tried to end myself, then I was in care of psychotherapy nurse , tried again last week , police kicked in my door took me to hospital.
Seen my doctor and psychologist, every day I think of how to do get rid of myself!
Had 7 attempts and can't even do that right I will soon

Are you at the hospital now, Kinni?

[kinni11]

No got other plans

[Fuzzybear]

Grrrrrrrr hospitals (sobbing...)

[Clara22]

Originally Posted by kinni11

No got other plans

What other plans?
sorry we are hijacking cryingontheinside's

[kinni11]

Going to long sleep were am at peace once and for all

[Fuzzybear]

Originally Posted by Clara22

What other plans?
sorry we are hijacking cryingontheinside's

I'm sorry too.. we are hijacking cryingontheinsides thread..

Maybe start new thread now?

((((( cryingontheinside )))))

[wiretwister]

Originally Posted by kinni11

Going to long sleep were am at peace once and for all

kinni if your still reading can you tell me a little of what is going on ... pm if you like ...

[kinni11]

Been struggling with depression::/anxiety for 4 years had all the help was of work for 8 months

[kinni11]

I work on a bridge we're I've saved people by talking them down , but I've witnessed 2 sucides one last year 21 year old guy spoke to him for 15 min then he screamed hit rocks and seen his body split in 2

[kinni11]

That part of my job , been back 2 weeks and feel worse I jumped of a bridge myself but someone grabbed me , took 2 overdose this month , one last week I thought I'd done it but just my luck am still here
Got few talblet to take later

[wiretwister]

can I start with a simple question ... at least it seems simple to me ... how or why did you get into this business of being near jumpers ... are you a sworn officer ... volunteer ... ?