[DechanDawa]

After calling a bunch of crisis hotlines in December and January I learned ways to manage my severe depression so that it won't escalate.

This means I don't think about going to the emergency room...which would be costly. I don't call the hotlines anymore.

I do all the stuff...deep breathing, hot bath, walk, and it helps. If I feel anxious I take the herb valerian...triple the recommended dose. It is sedating so not great for daytime.

The depression is about the same with frequent doses of suicidal ideation. It isn't getting better and I feel like I should just ignore it.

I won't take AD's so you could say I have been and continue to be suffering from unmedicated severe depression.

Mental health care has not helped.

Hi there,

May I ask why you won't take medication? It can be helpful for depression, especially ones that are severe enough that therapy alone isn't enough.

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by scaredandconfused

Hi there,

May I ask why you won't take medication? It can be helpful for depression, especially ones that are severe enough that therapy alone isn't enough.

I have severe side effects from AD's and they didn't help. My medical records list me as allergic to AD's. have tried twice. I am sorry but I consider AD's poison for me. Every single person I know irl on AD's has tried to come off them many times and can't because of severe withdrawals. To me that is the same as being addicted. Doctors are quick to put one on these drugs and they tell the patient not to worry about coming off them. That's what the doctor at my health care provider told me. To trust her. And she is not even there anymore! I was put on a drug without being told anything about side effects or given a pamphlet with the drug. I did not sleep for three days straight, had severe pain and migraines, and became suicidal. In fact, that is where the suicidal ideation started - with an AD. I got off the drug in a week and I will remain unmedicated. Whether or not AD's help with depression is not clinically known. I am not going to spend a life on and off and switching AD's. That is not good treatment at all.

Originally Posted by DechanDawa

I have severe side effects from AD's and they didn't help. My medical records list me as allergic to AD's. have tried twice. I am sorry but I consider AD's poison for me. Every single person I know irl on AD's has tried to come off them many times and can't because of severe withdrawals. To me that is the same as being addicted. Doctors are quick to put one on these drugs and they tell the patient not to worry about coming off them. That's what the doctor at my health care provider told me. To trust her. And she is not even there anymore! I was put on a drug without being told anything about side effects or given a pamphlet with the drug. I did not sleep for three days straight, had severe pain and migraines, and became suicidal. In fact, that is where the suicidal ideation started - with an AD. I got off the drug in a week and I will remain unmedicated. Whether or not AD's help with depression is not clinically known. I am not going to spend a life on and off and switching AD's. That is not good treatment at all.

Sorry to hear that you had such bad side effects, and that you weren't given any info on the drug you were taking. I am curious, where do you live? Here in Canada they have always given me information on any new meds I am taking. I recently started a medication for nightmares and the doctor and pharmacist let me know potential side effects and all that fun stuff.

I take an anti-depressant and can't honestly say 100% whether or not it's making a big difference. I feel better, but is that because of the AD, or another factor? I would like to think that it's helping, if even a bit. Fortunately it's free so that helps the decision making process a bit.

Honestly, things like exercise and socializing with others make a more noticeable difference (for me) than medication does. It may feel patronizing when your therapist encourages you to get outside daily, but it is a healthy thing to do if you are able.

If you are going through a severe depression though, I imagine during the hardest times you are probably laying down a lot, possibly sleeping the day away. You find it hard to do even the simplest tasks, everything is exhausting. So when you hear "just go outside, do some exercise, talk to a friend" it feels patronizing because it feels impossible to get out of bed, how are you supposed to go outside? During those times, be especially kind and gentle with yourself. Celebrate small victories such as taking a shower, or eating something healthy.

During my worst depression ever in the hospital, I stopped eating and stayed in bed most of the time. ECT was the only thing to bring me out of that one. It was far more effective than any medication I've taken, and would recommend it as a LAST CASE SCENARIO treatment, simply because of the memory side effects. If there were no side effects from ECT, I'd probably be doing maintenance treatments to this day. Just something else to consider if things get so bad that nothing else helps.

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by scaredandconfused

Sorry to hear that you had such bad side effects, and that you weren't given any info on the drug you were taking. I am curious, where do you live? Here in Canada they have always given me information on any new meds I am taking. I recently started a medication for nightmares and the doctor and pharmacist let me know potential side effects and all that fun stuff.

I take an anti-depressant and can't honestly say 100% whether or not it's making a big difference. I feel better, but is that because of the AD, or another factor? I would like to think that it's helping, if even a bit. Fortunately it's free so that helps the decision making process a bit.

Honestly, things like exercise and socializing with others make a more noticeable difference (for me) than medication does. It may feel patronizing when your therapist encourages you to get outside daily, but it is a healthy thing to do if you are able.

If you are going through a severe depression though, I imagine during the hardest times you are probably laying down a lot, possibly sleeping the day away. You find it hard to do even the simplest tasks, everything is exhausting. So when you hear "just go outside, do some exercise, talk to a friend" it feels patronizing because it feels impossible to get out of bed, how are you supposed to go outside? During those times, be especially kind and gentle with yourself. Celebrate small victories such as taking a shower, or eating something healthy.

During my worst depression ever in the hospital, I stopped eating and stayed in bed most of the time. ECT was the only thing to bring me out of that one. It was far more effective than any medication I've taken, and would recommend it as a LAST CASE SCENARIO treatment, simply because of the memory side effects. If there were no side effects from ECT, I'd probably be doing maintenance treatments to this day. Just something else to consider if things get so bad that nothing else helps.

Thanks. I am in the U.S. I don't know why they didn't discuss side effects. Maybe because family doctors dispense AD's like candy? And usually you get a pamphlet with the drug but I remember the pharmacist just told me that there was a possibility of suicidal ideation with teens so I didn't need to worry. Not true, anyway. After I researched it I found some adults to have this reaction to the drug I was given.

I have stopped day sleeping. I forced myself into a normal sleep schedule so that's good.

I suppose going out doesn't interest me because I have no money, and really it can be lonelier going out in a crowd when you are depressed.

Right now I am looking for a job. It seems insane to go from being in bed to going out and working but for me there will probably be no in-between.

In the U.S. I have a high deductible which means I have to pay for everything. ECT would be out of the question because of the cost as I am already in debt. I could no afford memory loss.

I don't know. I am severely depressed and at the same time the expectation is that I am supposed to go from this to be highly functioning. I can't afford therapy, hospitalization, ECT, drugs or any of it.

I am stuck. And I am the only one who is going to get me out of this.

Also, I really hate where I live at the moment (not just my apt. but the city and state) so I kind of hate going outside because it reminds me of that. But I am certain that has to do with the depression.

I think I will try to establish getting out to walk at least twice a day to get unstuck. Thanks.

[Alchemilla]

I'm sorry you are severely depressed. I am going through the same thing and it is debilitating. I wish there were a magical cure. I don't think anti-depressants are it. Getting out and walking twice a day sounds good.

[Clara22]

Hi,
What ADs did you get in the past?

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by Clara22

Hi,
What ADs did you get in the past?

\\


Why are you asking this? There are people who come on Psych Central who, for various reasons, do not take medication. I am not alone in this. There is a whole group of us. I should not have to defend myself in this regard.

So why would it matter what ADs I was on? I consider ADs poison. If other people want to take these drugs contrary to all the negative evidence then it is their business. If someone talks about the drugs they are on I never ask them, "Have you tried not being on these drugs," because that would be disrespectful. I really wish the drug people on PC would respect the non drug people.

As well, the drug people on here are always giving drug advice and I really wonder why as they are usually not mental health care professionals, doctors, of pdocs.

So why are you asking about what drug I was on? Are you qualified to give medical advice on pharma drugs?

[Clara22]

Not at all. I was curious because I need to start with the psychiatrist again and I don't know about drugs. I just used Prozac, but currently I am not taking any one. I have a lot of concerns about AD, as well

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by Clara22

Not at all. I was curious because I need to start with the psychiatrist again and I don't know about drugs. I just used Prozac, but currently I am not taking any one. I have a lot of concerns about AD, as well

In that case apologies. There are a lot of pro-drug people on this site. Since medication and therapy are the "go-to" treatment if that doesn't work then it feels like one is sunk.

I don't really want to name what AD's I was on. Anyway, if you read here people are constantly switching drugs and messing with dosage.

For some people ADs cause serious agitation. That has been my case because I have depression and anxiety. It could be that messing with serotonin levels is bad for anxiety.

In fact, some people who go on drugs for depression end up becoming bipolar. This is not uncommon.

It seems to me that the medical establishment is going to 100% advocate taking ADs so we have to be our own advocate.

Again, apologies for being kind of mean but I am in a mean mood today. Sorry.

[Clara22]

Oh, don't worry! I was told that Prozac worked for both, depression and anxiety. This is what happens to me under Prozac: it works for 3 months approximately. I become more stable. Then, taking it that does make any difference. Not sure for how many months I remain stable but after 3 months Prozac does not make any difference. I just would like to prolongue my stable period and be able to cope during my lowest low without medication.

In addition, I think that currently depression is largely fueled by society. We live in a sick and sickening society. In that regard I sometimes regret the drug industry because in this way we focus only on the individual. As society, we drug individuals so they "adapt" and don't bother while society continues damaging the lives of everyone. I don't denay brain issues but this is just part of the picture.

[DechanDawa]

Originally Posted by Clara22

Oh, don't worry! I was told that Prozac worked for both, depression and anxiety. This is what happens to me under Prozac: it works for 3 months approximately. I become more stable. Then, taking it that does make any difference. Not sure for how many months I remain stable but after 3 months Prozac does not make any difference. I just would like to prolongue my stable period and be able to cope during my lowest low without medication.

In addition, I think that currently depression is largely fueled by society. We live in a sick and sickening society. In that regard I sometimes regret the drug industry because in this way we focus only on the individual. As society, we drug individuals so they "adapt" and don't bother while society continues damaging the lives of everyone. I don't denay brain issues but this is just part of the picture.

This was brilliant. About society. I have found myself in a place of isolation but it was not entirely my fault. It is a big stress and I am trying to get out. And of course it causes depression and anxiety.

Every week this counselor calls to see how I am doing. She uses CBT. When I am not doing well I feel guilty. You know, because, of course, if it my responsibility to feel better.

So your words helped. All my problems really started with a divorce I did not want that left me financially bad off, and isolated. Too bad I didn't find a new partner. Again, my fault because I did not find anyone I wanted to commit to.

As for anti-depressants. I became extremely agitated on them and in the last case I became sucidal. Everyone says give them a chance. Well, I really cannot understand how it would be an expression of sanity to continue to take a drug which is causing anxiety, insomnia and suicidal ideation...on the off chance it might work in 6 or 8 weeks. And then three months later to stop working? No thank you.

All I can say is I went through the lowest of the lows in December when I was calling crisis hotlines 3 and 4 times a week. I learned some coping tools. It got me through and I am still here.

I am frustrated and in a very bad mood, but I did pull myself through the lowest period. I do think CBT helps but it takes time and effort.

Good luck. I just have no advice about drugs whatsoever.

[Clara22]

Thanks a lot

[DechanDawa]

Also like your Vaclav Havel quote. Great humanitarian.