[subtle lights]

I'm afraid..I can't think clearly at all these days.
There is nothing certain...I feel I'm really losing it
My brain doesn't work
I don't know if I'll ever be able to think, to work
It's like something is really wrong with me and it's getting worse and I don't know what
When I was smaller I thought my parents knew some big secret about me. Like I have some horrible illness or something but they won't ever tell me

[Fuzzybear]

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by subtle lights

I'm afraid..I can't think clearly at all these days.
There is nothing certain...I feel I'm really losing it
My brain doesn't work
I don't know if I'll ever be able to think, to work
It's like something is really wrong with me and it's getting worse and I don't know what
When I was smaller I thought my parents knew some big secret about me. Like I have some horrible illness or something but they won't ever tell me

Do you think it's time to reach out to a t or pdoc for some relief?

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm sorry you're struggling so badly..

[subtle lights]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Do you think it's time to reach out to a t or pdoc for some relief?

My T is on holiday and I won't get there until about 2 more weeks or more...
I'll have to call next week to make an appointment to the psychiatrist. Which is freaking me out a bit partially because I've never been, partially because my moods are very changable, so when I feel somewhat better I feel like I'm making it up. Though lately the ups are not so up...and not so often.

[Marla500]

It's still important to keep your appointment even if you feel ok when the time comes. Your pdoc will know moods can shift but help is still needed

[subtle lights]

Originally Posted by Marla500

It's still important to keep your appointment even if you feel ok when the time comes. Your pdoc will know moods can shift but help is still needed

I feel like others have real issues and I shouldn't complain. In the same time it's definitely not okay what's going on with me lately. One of my fears is that I go there and I will seem perfectly fine and they will look at me like I'm just making things up and laugh at me. I know it sounds stupid...but it's how I feel often.
Or they will just ignore me, and most probably misunderstand me. I don't know...

[subtle lights]

I'm tired of this emotional rollercoaster

[subtle lights]

Everyone is saying "fight, fight". But I don't have the energy anymore. I don't know, maybe I am too scared to be myself. Maybe I'm scared of myself. Maybe it's just too much and I want to rest

[MtnTime2896]

I'd say it's worth taking the chance, talking to the professionals, I think it's worth it.

I wish I had some advice for you, but I can't seem to find the right words.

I'm here for you, though. Anytime I can and you need me, I'm here.

[Marla500]

You are wearing yourself out trying to carry it all on your own. I think we have all done our share of that! You need to give your pdoc a chance to help you