[20oney]

I've had constant depression for over two and a half years now.. Tried a few different anti depressants, psychologists, psychiatrists, lifestyle changes, etc.. Nothing seems to work, and that's not me being negative about it, it's just how it is.

My first T I saw for a little over a year, and I found she got to a point where she'd go over a relapse plan with me - aka, she gave up. What does one do with a relapse plan, when they're suffering the full extent of depression?

T number two, the current one, I've been with for a little under a year, she seems to be able to read between the lines a little more, but I still get the sense that she's ready to give up also. She can at least acknowledge that things aren't working, but that just fills my mind with fear..

I seem to try all these different things to change where my mind is at, but nothing works. I'm sure there are still things to try, but really, what if this is it for me? This is as good as I'll ever feel for the rest of my life. How long until I decide that it's really not work breathing through another minute? How long until I give up on keeping on and just become a vegetable? How does one live through a lifetime with something life this? Constantly dragging yourself through the mud, day in, day out.

[little turtle]

have you had a thorough workup by a general practitioner...

[MickeyCheeky]

I can relate a lot to what you say..

[Sunflower123]

I feel the same and I AM seeing a therapist and a doctor and have made lifestyle changes. I understand how you feel and I go in and out of severe depression which makes me wonder if things will ever get better. You're not alone. I hope you feel better soon.

[20oney]

Originally Posted by little turtle

have you had a thorough workup by a general practitioner...

Sure have, a couple of times now.. Same story, nothing wrong there

[Sunflower123]

What about changing to another therapist and pdoc? There may be something out there that might help. Your thoughts of what if it doesn't get better is the depression talking. What if it can and does get better? What if the answer is right around the corner? Hold on. Keep fighting. You deserve a good life and you are worth it.

[20oney]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

What about changing to another therapist and pdoc? There may be something out there that might help. Your thoughts of what if it doesn't get better is the depression talking. What if it can and does get better? What if the answer is right around the corner? Hold on. Keep fighting. You deserve a good life and you are worth it.

I'm pretty happy with my current therapist at the moment.. I'm just starting to get comfortable with her. As for pdoc, I'm over that - as in, I've tried a few drugs, and I'm not currently interested in trying the next..

Yeah, the depression talks louder than words

Originally Posted by 20oney

I've had constant depression for over two and a half years now.. Tried a few different anti depressants, psychologists, psychiatrists, lifestyle changes, etc.. Nothing seems to work, and that's not me being negative about it, it's just how it is.

My first T I saw for a little over a year, and I found she got to a point where she'd go over a relapse plan with me - aka, she gave up. What does one do with a relapse plan, when they're suffering the full extent of depression?

T number two, the current one, I've been with for a little under a year, she seems to be able to read between the lines a little more, but I still get the sense that she's ready to give up also. She can at least acknowledge that things aren't working, but that just fills my mind with fear..

I seem to try all these different things to change where my mind is at, but nothing works. I'm sure there are still things to try, but really, what if this is it for me? This is as good as I'll ever feel for the rest of my life. How long until I decide that it's really not work breathing through another minute? How long until I give up on keeping on and just become a vegetable? How does one live through a lifetime with something life this? Constantly dragging yourself through the mud, day in, day out.

Depression can be terrible and drain us for energy and that often means drained for the energy to be able to motivate oneself as well. I want to recommend you a book that, as far as I know, have helped many people who didn't get over their depression before they had read this book.

May be what you need is a decision to go forward and never look back? My "success" with depression has been to make a schedule according to my level of energy and follow that from minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day and stick to the schedule what ever happens. I have forbidden myself to think of "what if I never overcome this?". Instead I have used one hour each evening to let my worries or what ever come through and stopped the worrying when that "worrying time" had passed. (It's not only a "worrying hour". I also use it to work with triggers and how to meet them when they occur). I have set apart several hours one day of the week to plan ahead the next week , making a new schedule and so on.

I called it my "success with depression" and I don't mean by that that I have got rid of my depression, but that I have found a why that works for me and helps me to be well for long periods. May be you need to do other things, but please sit down and write down what might work for you. (When I skip my routiens my depression gets worse)

If I could have some succsess, so can you!

The book I reccomend was recommened to me some years ago by a friend. It was very helpful. My reccomandation is that you read it through and see if you find toughts there that can give you hope. Depression never stops by it self, we all have some work to do to overcome it!

"Breaking the Patterns of Depression"; September 15, 1998 by Michael Yapko (Author)

I have only read this one, but he has written another one later:

" Keys to Unlocking Depression: An Internationally Known Depression Expert Tells You What You Need to Know to Overcome Depression"; January 1, 2016

You can look at them at Amazon!

Good luck with coming out of your depression, step by step!

[*Laurie*]

The proper antidepressant would help you immensely.

Originally Posted by 20oney

I'm pretty happy with my current therapist at the moment.. I'm just starting to get comfortable with her. As for pdoc, I'm over that - as in, I've tried a few drugs, and I'm not currently interested in trying the next..

Good to hear!