Another thing I've recognized that's making me depressed is that I haven't been able to move on from my teenage dream of what I wanted to do with my life not coming to pass.. My mum bullied me into doing what she wanted me to do, and I never got over that. I tried and tried to find my way back to my own path, but it kept slipping further and further away until I lost all hope..

This is going to sound so dramatic, but I was looking at my reflection in the mirror and saw that the light's gone from my eyes.. Years ago when I was still working towards my dream, but not really believing in it anymore because my life had changed and I was in a different place, I could still see this sparkle in my eye.. Now there's just a dull and tired gaze. I feel I've half killed myself trying to force this thing ithat was just never meant to be..

I want to move on now - I NEED to move on. So my life didn't go as I'd planned and wanted it to, but you know what - maybe it'll be even better! This thought gives me a lot of joy I'm still here, still living and breathing - almost anything's possible! I just have to go after it and leave the past behind.

[Karen1147]

Ya that's how you do it. If you hold on to that past it'll destroy you for sure. The hard part is removing the people who try to hold you to the past. That's where it gets slippery.

I'm kind of in awe over how this whole post sounds like something I would say, word for word. Even just a few days ago, I was looking in the mirror and thinking exactly the same thing.

I appreciate reading your optimism this morning, and I think you're on to something. Thank you.

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm really happy to read this May you achieve your dreams and goals.

Wow Bjørnen! It's amazing when that happens I'm so glad my post was of help to you!

[Shazerac]

Good for you., great insight. Good luck on your journey

[Fuzzybear]

[Sunflower123]

Good for you. I hope you find the path that is right for you and your life is even better then you expect.

Thanks for this post. I needed to read this right at this time. Sending big hugs.

[Misterpain]

In life all things are possible until we die physicaly ,even an emotional death maybe overwhelming but never surrendering your dreams is the hallmark of successfull people , you may have to go thru a lot of garbage and have to "pay your dues" many times over to re route your life,but keeping your eye on the "prize" cant be understated ,you'll have bad days and horrible days along the way but stay grounded by remembering why your doing this , what you are climbing to achieve and the happiness/ satisfaction you can expect when you get there, dont be unrealistic keep your goals achievable otherwise they will beat you to a pulp ,so if say you want to a physicist dont make that the only goal ,because it will kill you as starving student waiting tables or picking up garbage to earn a living to get the experience and degree , so incremental goals will give you positive reinforcement of what you are accomplishing.

My final thought is I am sorry your mom derailed you , it's a parents job to guide us and help shape us to be good moral and just ,it's really unfair of them to pressure you into something that in many cases is baggage from there own life and unrealized dreams of there own .
It's a very old saying but it's really true "living well is the best revenge " , so kick the tires and light the fires back up on who or what, you want to be ! And put in the work to make it happen,working on yourself pays the greatest dividend , and as people who have achieved there personal goals or dreams say " if you love what you do,or are ,you will never work another day in your life" because accomplishing what you want or dream about makes everything after that not hard at all ,getting paid to be who or what you want to be is someone fulfilled and happy ,where or how you started becomes so much less important, when you are fulfilled. I have multiple disabilities and some of them are from or because of accomplishing my dream,I would not change a thing about my life even with knowing what happens to me,because that would mean I didn't get my dream, I didn't make a difference at perhaps the worst moment of someone else's life which would mean my personal suffering as kid was all for nothing ,and my dreams were unfulfilled and that would be a death of 1000 cuts.

Focus less on where you have been or are and when you get to your dream everything in between are war stories you can inspire others to do the same ,never give up or out on yourself ! Even when the days are long and hard and the nights are even worse, and remember there is never a linear path to anything , like Edison who found a thousand ways to make a bad lightbulb, he is remembered not for the 1000 wrong ways but for the way he succeeded, be Edison and light up the path to your dreams ,they still exist and can still be accomplished.