I'm confused, sad, angry, depressed, hurt. Geez I'm just upset in general. Anyways now to whats bothering me.
I messed up bad. I told someone what someone was saying about them because I thought that they should know that someone was talking bad about her and needless to say the person who said it is saying I'm lying. Yes, I know i shouldn't have told her what was being said about her but if it were me being talked bad about I'd want to know. I know i was wrong' but at the time I thought she should know. But now am angry because the person who is saying it or was saying it is denying it and saying its all me. I feel bad now too because now there is this tension between me and the person who was saying it and me and the person I told.
Like I said I know i was wrong to tell her what was being said about her but I was just thinking about how i'd want to know what people were saying about me.

[Mouse_]

This is the trouble when we allow ourselfs to be tringalated. Its not our business to inform anyone.

[Perna]

That's hard. I would get the three of you together and apologize for upsetting them (but not for anything specific you did or did not do/tell, etc.). Maybe next time you can ask someone their preferences as to whether they want to hear what is being said about them. Not everyone does and it's a good idea to ask people about themselves instead of assuming they are "like" us and have our preferences. And/or you can go to the person saying bad things and suggest they say it to the person's face, let them know you don't think it is a good idea that they are talking behind the person's back.

I imagine some of this might blow over in time but the teller might make sure in the future that you're not around when the telling is going on and let others know you report what is said behind people's backs. But I think the person being talked about will learn that the teller can't be trusted to be kind, if not immediately, also over time. Leopards don't change their spots :-)

[wickedwings]

i know it's hard to keep your silence. sometimes, it can be hard knowing whther there's truth in what the person is saying. when i hear things like this about someone i know, i keep it to myself because it may not even be true. i know this doesn't really help you, but it's one way to go about it.

[dragonphoto]

I had the same problem with my wife and her (best) friend. I was chatting with her friend and I knew my wife had been going through a lot and I could not be there for her so I suggested that her friend give her a call. Her friend told me that the phone works both ways and unless I could not tell she did not give a sh!$. So I called my wife and asked if something had happened between them and when she asked me why I told her. Right away she called her friend and her friend told her that she would call her back. Then the IM's hit me from her friend, don't ever talk to me again. I was only doing what I thought was right. When my wife talked to her later that night her friend told her that I was lying and that I said she was attractive too. I know how my wife feels about liars and the fact that she is still hanging with her confuses the crap out of me. Sometimes it is better to keep your mouth shut the only reason I could not is because I knew my wife counted on this person and they had let her down. I felt really bad and have not really talked to her friend anymore.