[BusyLibrarian]

Tuesday I was able to go back to my old college and attend honors social where I got to eat delicious food, socialize with other honorees and take pictures with the president of the school which was pretty neat. I met up with an old professor and told him everything that I had been going through this semester and he was very open to what I was saying to him. He told me that I have lots of potential and that his door is open anytime. He went as far as giving me his number because he knew how important it was for me to be in contact with someone who cares about me.

I got to see my psychiatrist yesterday after calling them everyday for an appointment. My doctor seemed very different this time. He showed me eye contact the entire time that I was there unlike the other times that I have seen him. I was starting to think that I needed a new psychiatrist because his lack of eye contact or looking up from his computer notes made it seem like he didnt really care. He said that It was good to see me and to stay safe, wondering how I was able to still work in the current conditoin that I am in. Im surprised that he didn't ask me to work less hours or leave the job or anything like that. I was able to get my medication upped which was exactly what I needed. I am now taking 30mg of Remeron instead of 15mg. I have not been in therapy in several weeks and I am going crazy. I have contacted Nami about possibly seeing a mentor like figure through them on Thursday of last week but I have yet to hear from them yet. Seeing this mentor will not make me completely depend on one or two persons in my therapist and psychaitrist for the future which will help me.

Starting my new job in international logistics has made everything hard. I came in not knowing anything about logistics and I feel like I have to stay for experience that I can use in the future. Its really hard to get a job like what I have right now and I think about that when I want to quit. Working has made going to therapy and seeing my psychaitrist very difficult and I didnt want to take any time off during my first two weeks here. At the job, I am not able to concentrate, focus, or remember anything, making things uncomfortable for me. These things will go beyond my first month here because I feel like how someone would feel at a new job all the time.

[Skeezyks]

Thanks for sharing your progress. I'm sorry you're not able to concentrate, focus or remember anything in your new job. This must be making it very difficult to settle in. It can take a while to get used to a new job, especially when you go in not knowing much of anything about it. Hopefully there are some other employees there who can help you to learn the ropes, as the saying goes. A mentor from NAMI sounds like a great idea too!