[smallbluefish]

my most recent major depressive episode was in january and since then I think I've gotten a lot better / am in a much better place to get support if I get to that stage again. I'm still somewhat depressed but definitely don't anticipate returning to that stage soon.

but lately I've been reflecting, and I feel like over the years my depression has led me on a steady decline, even if my coping skills and support systems have become better. i.e. the general threshold of how good I can feel just keeps getting lower even if it's a little steadier overall.

depression is so isolating and it's strange to think that I don't know how sad or alone I might feel in the future... I really can't imagine a future where I'm capable of maintaining a state where I'm not constantly at least a little sad.

[Yzen]

We change constantly and really don't know how our future self will be. I have noticed some changes, skills, and recovery happen over a longer period of time and some happen instantly. That gives hope for the future.

I hope your threshold of how good you can feel is greater than you can imagine right now.